Emotional Ride of Hell

I Still Love, The Way You Hurt Me

It has been seven months
Seven long months, Jack hasn't spoken to Alex. Not a call, any emails or even a tweet mention.
Jack moved on from Alex, ever since he decided to leave the band, to pursue his solo career. The brunette left in a rush, leaving Jack high and dry, never truly apologising for what he did.
"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to screw you over in the process." The elder mumbled on the phone, on his way to LA. "I really love you."
Jack still didn't know why he hung immediately after that. He probably couldn't face the fact that his lover would easily just dissolve years and years of hard work and dreams for the sake of his self-interest. Most importantly, he just erased every single thing he and Jack ever was, making it non-existent.
But it was all expected, Alex had always been selfish. Jack should have known, but it felt like a kick to the gut when Alex simply left, after playing with Jack's heart for all these years.
"I really love you babe."
"I will forever be by your side, alright?"
"You are my only one."
And many other things the elder whispered into the skunk haired man's ear, as he traced his fingers gently down Jack's back.
"Do you love me?" The younger always asked, before getting a sloppy kiss from Alex as the answer.
"I always will."
And Jack always believed him.

"Oh fuck, I'm so sorry!" Jack apologised, after he accidentally bumped into somebody, causing them to fall.
"Are you o- Alex?" The skunk haired boy asked suddenly, shocked at the coincidence.
"The one and only." The brunette mumured, brushing off the dust after getting up. "I mean like do you want a sel- oh."
An awkward silence followed, the pair knowing that both had something to say to each other.
Jack never expected Alex would have the heart to come back to Baltimore, he figured he was too busy living in LA to bother.
"Oh, hi." Jack started, biting his lip as he figured what to say next. "Why are you here?"
"Um, I was in town, and thought, why not stop by the bar or something." He replied, his voice tense. "You?"
"Well, for starters, I live here." The skunk haired man snapped, before regretting it immediately after seeing the hurt written on Alex's face.
"So how are you?" Jack asked, digging his foot into the sidewalk, trying to change the subject.
"I-I'm doing fine." The elder stammered, scratching his head.
He still stutters when he lies, Jack realised, trying to read the brunette'a expression.
"Are you seeing anybody?" Alex asked suddenly, which caught the younger by surprise.
"Um, yeah, there's this really cool girl who I just met a few days ago." The skunk haired man lied, smiling at Alex. "I asked her out the other night, and I don't know she is great."
"Oh." The brunette simply replied, his face falling. "I hope things go well between you two."
"I gotta go, I'm meeting my publicist in an hour." Alex said, getting ready to go.
"Um wait, do you want to go out for a drink tonight? Just friends?" Jack asked, grabbing the elder's arm.
"Sorry." Alex wiggled his arm away from Jack. "I'm flying off to New York tonight."
"Oh, okay." The younger replied, tears forming in his eyes. "If you wanna stop by, my house is always open."
"Okay, cool." Alex said, before turning away, leaving Jack the same way he was seven months ago, lost and left out.

"Missing NYC! 😜" was the caption for Alex's latest Instagram upload. For some reason, the photo of The New York skyline made Jack's heart sink slightly.
He quickly scrolled past it, not bothering to like it.
Jack was quickly interrupted by a phone call from an unknown number, which for some reason looked familiar. He shook his head, turning the phone screen down on his bed.
A ping came from his phone, signalling a text message. Jack quickly took it, checking his phone.
'I'm sorry' was all it said.
Jack barely had time to answer back when his phone gave another message.
'I really love you.'
'Please take me back, I'm so sorry.'
'I'm so sorry so sorry'
The skunk haired man tried to type back a message but his phone was suddenly receiving a call from the number.
"I miss you Jack, why did I ever let you go?" Alex cried over the phone, his voice hoarse. "Why?"
"Ale-"
"Jack, I want to come back home, I don't want to go anywhere," The elder sobbed, his speech slurring. "I'm so alone Jack, no one ever helped me."
"Alex? What happened?" The younger asked, suddenly concerned for the brunette.
"I cancelled my flight, and my label is threatening to drop me and I'm all alone in this big field, I don't know, my whiskey is all gone, I don't know." Alex ranted onto the phone, his voice desperate. "Can I just go back home, to you?"
"Yeah, yeah you can."

Alex didn't know what he had done, hardly something that happened nowadays. It was his fault as usual, no one else was to blame.
One minute Jack was opening his door to his apartment, and the next Alex pinned him against the wall, forcing a sloppy drunken kiss onto the skunk haired man.
"Stop!" The younger yelled, as he pushed Alex away, tears threatening to burst. "You think you want to play with heart again? After what happened?"
The brunette stayed silent, clutching his jacket in the corner.
"I'm sorry." The elder mumbled, his eyes fixed the floor. "I-I didn't mean it."
"Always, you make it about you." Jack snapped, his voice wobbly. "When would you ever care about me?"
"When Alex? When?"
The skunk haired man waited for an answer from Alex, before raising his arms out in defeat. The brunette opened his mouth, but he closed it before he shook his head.
"Fuck it, you are really a lost cause." The younger muttered, slamming his keys onto the kitchen counter.
He filled up a cup with water before he handed it to Alex. The elder looked up to Jack, tears running down his cheeks, his lips trembling.
"Take it, god knows how much you drank tonight." Jack remarked, feeling bad for snapping at Alex.
"Thanks." The elder mumbled, taking the cup in his hands. He didn't drink it straight away, realising something about it.
"Isn't this my favourite cup?" He said, running his finger over Cinderella's face.
"Yeah, I knew you would regconise it." Jack replied, taking a seat next to the brunette on the floor.
"That's nice you still remembered it." He replied, leaning in to Jack.
He felt the skunk haired man tense up slightly at his touch, but he slowly relaxed.
"Can I hold your hand?" The younger asked, holding out his hand, smiling at the brunette.
"Sure." The elder said, as he interlocked his fingers with Jack's. "I missed you a lot, you know."
"Me too." Jack said softly.
"Will you ever be my boyfriend again?" The brunette asked, squeezing Jack's hand.
Jack tilted his head to look at Alex, his eyes glazing over.
"At this time?" Jack said, running his hand up and down his thigh. "Never again."
"I understand." Alex replied, closing his eyes. "I'm sorry."