Satan's Queen

9

Kaitlyn snapped open her eyes. She was alone. No angel had come to comfort her. Unlike last night, her dreams must have been quiet. Quickly, she whipped off her blanket and pulled herself up the bed. The sheet was dry. No semen. It seemed Zeke was right: her dreams weren't "real". Just to be certain, she reached down into her underwear—she was dry there too.

Pulling the covers back up, she tried to relax but it was impossible. Why was she still dreaming about him? Even now she felt her body yearn for him, for his arms and protection and affections. Though he'd been evil and terrible and hateful, she couldn't shake the feeling.

Why couldn't she dream of Jacob instead?

Frustrated tears rolled down her cheeks. With a grimace, she dropped her chin to her chest. The worst was over and yet she still felt as bad as ever.

'Kaitlyn,' came Samuel's voice through the door. 'Are you all right?'

'I'm fine,' she answered, annoyed with herself.

'Do you need some help?'

Kaitlyn rested her head back against the wall with a sigh. 'No, thank you.'

It was barely a minute later when there came a light tap at the door.

'I said, I'm fine,' Kaitlyn snapped.

The door opened and Zeke entered. Kaitlyn couldn't help it; she burst into tears. 'Why can't I get over it? Why can't I get over him?'

'You are and always will be his vessel, Kaitlyn. You were designed to love him.'

'I don't love him,' Kaitlyn hissed. 'I love Jacob. I love good and kind and gentle Jacob. You see this?' She pulled out the necklace from beneath her shirt. 'You know who gave me this? Satan! And I'm still wearing it.'

'Satan is gone now, Kaitlyn. Lucifer ...'

'Can't hurt me anymore? Well, he's doing a pretty fine job of it.' Throwing off her blankets, she slid from the bed. 'I have to get rid of it.'

Zeke stepped back as Kaitlyn left the room and walked down the corridor towards the bathroom. She entered and looked down at the bowl of water.

'Kaitlyn.'

'Stop it Zeke, I have to do it.' And she wrenched the necklace from her neck, breaking the clasp. She stood before the toilet, her hand wrapped tightly around the diamonds as she held them over the water. Throw it. Throw it! A tear dripped from her nose.

'Why am I so weak? You told me that once, that I needed to be strong, but I'm still as weak as ever.'

'That's not what I said at all. I said that only through accepting your weaknesses can you be strong. And that's more paramount now than ever. You still haven't learned. Kaitlyn ...' His voice was achingly tender. More tears dripped.

Gently, he covered her clenched fist with his big hand and pulled it close to her chest. He guided her away. Kaitlyn hung her head.

'You love him, Kaitlyn. And you will always love him. I've always loved him.'

Kaitlyn looked up with a start. 'You do?'

Zeke smiled. 'Jacob was enamoured. What was the word he used? "Irresistible"?'

Kaitlyn gave a half-smile, remembering their conversation so many weeks ago.

'The thing is, it's not the hatred and ferocity inside him that we love. It's the goodness, the tenderness, the hurt. He was hurting just as much as Jacob and Jacob loved him for it.' He touched her cheek. 'Just like you. You loved the good parts of him. If you look back, did you truly love his hatred and his anger and his lies?'