Silly ( Boyxboy )

Silly smile.

"How are you today Hyo ?" it was a question Yukwon asked often, sometimes it was his first sentence instead of saying Good morning or 'Hello. "Fine." and this was his usual answer as the day would begin for everyone with a breakfast or not.

Jae Hyo didn't understand when someone asked him if he was fine, he couldn't understand because he didn't know what to answer other than fine. Even when he was feeling bad or whatever he would feel, he would always give the same answer. Fine. He can answer something else, what could he answer other than fine to not make people worry ? Nothing else than fine. He didn't know what people were expecting other than 'good'.

Being fine was the answer.

•

He couldn't hide anything from Yukwon, because Yukwon knew his heart. Yukwon didn't have to try to understand Jae Hyo, because Jae Hyo's mind and heart were a book that only him could read. Yukwon is special. But sometime it was upsetting Jae Hyo without noticing. "Why are you angry ? " He would ask when he was feeling the visual getting grumpier and he would sigh every single time when the answer came. " I'm not." the visual would reply coldly.

Things like this happened often. Sometime he wished that Yukwon could stop guessing how he was feeling. Or that his face would stop reveals his mood. He wished he could stop being so expressive. He wished Yukwon could stop knowing how he felt when himself didn't.

•

"Why don't you go away !" he shouted. He didn't know why he shouted, he didn't know why he was so angry. Jae Hyo's whole body trembled, blood pulsing, glowering at Yukwon, his heart was beating loudly inside of his chest as if it was a clock, second by second the face of the younger darkened. " Is that so.. " Why are you angry ? I should be the one being mad not you.

Only with a few words Jae Hyo never felt this regretful, why did he had to shout and loose his temper. Maybe it was because Yukwon called him a kid.. He didn't like it, he didn't wanted to be considered like a kid. Because it meant that Yukwon considered him like a child and he was here only to take care of a children. Arguing about that. He never imagined to have an argument about a subject this random.

He didn't know if he wanted to throw up or cry.

I trusted you, and still in your eyes I was only a kid.

He was sad, angry and also frustrated. Being angry caused him a lack of judgement, a sense of inbred hate, and overall frustration. When Yukwon turned his back to go out of his room Jae Hyo felt something spill inside of him as if he had broken something he shouldn't have. He was so angry, so mad but it didn't stop his tears. Why was he crying ? Was it the frustration or something like that ? Because he wasn't strong enough to tame his feeling ? He doesn't know things like this. He knows when he is happy or sad. When it hurts, when he's safe. He was always hurt and sad after being angry. Because for him being angry is being sad.

It was childish indeed.

•

Yukwon doesn't have time for him, even now. In fact he never had. Between Bastarz's activities and his girlfriend, there's no place for Jae Hyo.