❝Wanna fall in love again?❞
In which a man reads his ex-wife's diary from their teenage years and develops more than just a little feelings for her again.
[jjk × oc]
**slow updates**
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Dear Diary,
I know, it's been a while since I wrote. Have you been well?
You must be wondering why I'm writing in a new notebook instead of the last one, which is half filled. Well, Mum caught hold of my diary while unpacking, and well, in typical mum fashion, she read it. I wasn't mad about it, because she knows all of it. I just like to write because it helps me fall asleep.
She gave me some unsolicited advice, but now looking back, it wasn't that unsolicited. I kind of agree with what she said. She asked me while having dinner what I wrote in it. I assumed she did not read and respected my privacy, so I told her. I told her that sometimes I can't fall asleep, so I write down my thoughts to calm myself down, and when I had no more thoughts left, I wrote about my day. It became a habit, and I stuck with it. I liked reading back at what I wrote since it is a collection of my memories.
Her frown deepened, and she told me all my writings sound sad. I didn't know how to respond, since I'm not sad all the time, but sure, I had been pretty gloomy about the whole moving thing. She even asked me if I read back my diary entries, and I said yes.
Mum told me that I should only write about my happy days and happy memories, because sadness, once captured in something and visited again and again, hurts us. That time I had stormed off from the dinner table, my dinner unfinished and locked myself up in my room. I didn't talk to her the next day either. But, I realised that my diary was still with her, and I was too prideful to accept it.
She apologised for reading it without permission and returned it to me the next week, and I did too, but I for some reason could not make myself open it and write about my days anymore. Whenever I tried to, I could hear her advice, and it made my mind race with so many thoughts that sometimes my head hurt.
But I realised she was right. Re-reading my entries which gave off negative feelings like jealousy, sadness, anger, and frustration ruined my mood, even if it was happy. I guess she was right.
That is why I started a new notebook because from now on I'm only going to write about my happy memories and the things that give me joy and make me extremely happy.
-현재
Dear Diary,
It's been a month since we moved here. We picked up Dad from the airport today, and our family is finally together. He got me a large plushie from the airport because I was pestering him for it. We had lunch together at a local roadside tteokbokki restaurant because it's his favourite junk food. I've had tteokbokki at home before, but this one was so good, that I ate more than my usual portions.
We're going to look for high schools near our area for me tomorrow. I love mum, but I wish that dad would come with me. He never says no to me. I've started to converse more and more in Korean, but hints of my accent come up from time to time, and from the dramas I've seen, I need to improve them. I don't want to be bullied in school. That's the reason I'm writing in Korean too so that my writing speed and accuracy will also be taken care of.
