"Matt, you totaled the kids car! You totaled his fucking Subaru!"
In which cyrus, a freshmen in college sets out to restart her life, unsure of what to even expect when she's starting over with the triplets.
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"CHEATERS DONT DESERVE COWS."
song of the chapter: ITS NEVER ENOUGH - we are the dirt
NOW that Alex had been out of her life, cyrus had too much freetime. Sure, she had the triplets, but she was more alone than she had ever felt before.
Truthfully, she missed him. She missed her first love, who was always there. Always by her side, comforting her. He knew everything about her, every dark secret she had revealed to him had no use anymore. Alex wasn't there anymore.
Loitering by herself on the sturniolo households couch, early in the morning had been the only sort of comfort she had at the moment. Nick insisted the girl stayed over again. Cyrus hadn't minded, though she was mentally alone, she'd rather not be physically alone as well. Nick usually woke up earlier than his brothers, but after staying out late and filming last night he needed to sleep in, unfortunately to cyrus. She felt like she had been imposing on her friends if anything, rather than staying over for fun like she did usually.
Matt strolled out from his room; heading down the stairs. He'd been aware that cyrus stayed over, but not that she had been awake. While his brothers slept, Matt promised himself he'd wake up early, but with unsure reasoning. Was it because he simply wanted to be up before everyone? Or because he wanted to gaze at cyrus some more?
Seeing cyrus peacefully asleep on his couch had been his guilty pleasure, and little secret. Of course, his infatuation with her hadn't been a secret to his brothers, but the private admiration was. Nobody knew in depth how Matt felt for her, besides himself of course.
To his sort of unpleasant surprise, as soon as he stepped down the stairs and immediately glanced in the direction of the couch, he saw cyrus. Wide awake. His brows shot up in shock, his lips parting. Any words he tried to force out jammed in the back of his throat, the silence pummeling down on his nerves. Cyrus had noticed the mindless shift in the air, turning her head. She hadn't heard Matt come down the stairs, but rather she felt his gaze.
Cyrus could always feel him looking at her, Even in her sleep.
The girls brows raised themselves, not in a rather mocking way. "You're up early." She spoke, turning her body towards Matt, who could feel his own limbs restrict from movement, tensing up. He was getting her full attention. A nervous smile spread on his lips as he shrugged helplessly. "Just.. uh, not tired anymore." Matt struggled to come up with some pathetic excuse on why he had been up. It had been a lie, considering he was running on three and a half hours of sleep, but he had rather wasted his time admiring the girl before him instead of sleeping.
If his brothers had known; they would've busted his balls. Especially Nick.
"You're also awake early." Matt murmured, clearing his throat. Cyrus only took a blink of an eye to respond, tilting her head to lean onto her own shoulder. "Yeah, I didn't sleep too good." Cyrus replied, an amused but tired smile playing at her lips. As much as Matt was happy to be alone with her for once in forever, he was concerned as to why she was awake, tired. What was keeping cyrus up?
The amused grin on his lips dropped slightly, mimicking her head tilt in some ways. "Is it the couch? Temperature? Why?" He asked, his voice hadn't even began to show the true panic behind his words. Taking his own sort of risk, Matt inched closer to the couch, only a foot between the two of them as he looked down at her, unaware that only in Matt's head, that his gaze had been anything but platonic. Cyrus snickered to his sudden worry, resting her chin onto the back of the couch. "No, the couch is comfy. I think I'm just overthinking, a lot. You know, about Alex." She said. His name had tensed up Matt, immediately. He couldn't express in words how much he hated Alex.
"Oh, right." Matt responded, nodding understandingly. Though, he hated the dude, he could read cyrus quite well. He always could. "Sorry, it's been literally all of the drama and topics lately. I don't mean to bring it up, really." She suddenly shook her head, which made Matt mindfully curse at himself. She was putting those damn walls back up. Hurriedly, Matt shook his head, making way to sit besides her onto the couch — a rather bold move if you asked him.
"No — no, it's fine. I understand what you're going through." Except, he didn't. Matt hadn't been cheated on, or hurt romantically like she had. Matt hadn't ever loved anyone besides cyrus, or his family of course. But that was different. Besides, his love for cyrus wasn't returned in the way he had preferred. A sympathetic smile spread on cyrus' lips, her hand gently resting upon his shoulder - as if she was consoling the boy. The touch caused his body to stiffen, his breath to falter just slightly. "I didn't know." She said, breathlessly. Eager to correct her, Matt opened his mouth to speak, but nothing had come out. Not yet. Cyrus figured she hadn't been around to know these things, but the fact that somebody had hurt Matt? She couldn't imagine. She knew the sweetheart he was, he could truthfully do no wrong. Atleast, not intentionally.
"No, not.. not like that." Matt corrected, suddenly feeling an overwhelming source of embarrassment. He never verbally confessed he hadn't been in a real relationship before. Especially not to cyrus. "I can just.. understand. You know, how you feel. I haven't been there but, yeah.." he mumbled, his words glued together like broken glass. Cyrus paused, a sudden but stiff nod in reply. "Oh, right. Yeah, well. I guess it's kind of, obvious. Cheating is never a good thing when it's someone you were inlove with."
The words pained Matt to hear. He knew she had loved him, but hearing it outloud brought a thunderstorm of negative emotion to his soul. Something he had tried to repair for her. "I guess it's kind of inevitable, right? I mean. Alex was going off to college, there's plenty of pretty girls there. More mature.. more.."
Not as pretty as you, he thought.
she paused, side eyeing Matt with a wary look. "Sexually.. active." She shrugged her shoulder. The comment caught him off guard by a mile, making him pause. It was one hell of a confession that soothed his nerves, for now.
But it wasn't the main focus. "That's no excuse, cyrus. It's not inevitable, either. Truthfully, Alex didn't deserve you. It's just a lesson, unfortunately. You know now what you do and don't deserve." He responded, trying to be as comforting but blunt as possible. Though, spilling his entire heart out to her felt a little tempting, it would've been too much for the two of them to handle.
Cyrus, was inevitable to him.
The girl gazed at Matt, her eyes flashing an emotion he couldn't read for once. He typically could figure what was going on in her mind, but not now. "Well, I guess I don't mean.. inevitable." She whispered, sighing to herself. Cyrus shifted back, leaning into the couch cushions. "It just happens a lot, you know? To girls, and guys. Once college hits it's like a trigger to make most relationships spiral." She shrugged. Though the words tugged on her heartstrings, she knew the last thing she needed to do was cry infront of Matt.
Matt didn't know, not that she thought like this, but that it happened a lot. Or that college was a big reasoning factor. Cyrus wasn't the type of girl you'd find better with, she was simply the best. Everything she had done or said brought an erratic beat to his heart or a smile to his face. "Those guys, or girls, aren't worth it then. Those are the type of people that don't get married, or have a family, a farm with plenty of cows." He smiled as he spoke, watching cyrus' lips form into the same grin as his. He knew he could get her to smile.
"I guess that's true. Cheaters don't deserve cows." She teased, snickering to herself. Matt laughed along, only matching her energy. He did find her funny, but more than anything, he admired her smile, her laugh, and her voice. Cyrus was a dream factory of everything Matt wanted to look at or hear. She was simply better than any of his favorite films or songs. She was on constant replay in his mind.
