The Squad Behind Us [Attack On Titan]

Kido Rubin- Part One

Levi was having second thoughts about reading this journal. Sure, this guy was dead, but that didn't mean that it was okay to go poking around in his personal things. Some of this stuff might be important to this soldier's family. Levi wasn't going to keep the journal forever. He'd give it back to the family once he was done with it with the excuse of, "He hid it so well that the person who moved into his room found it while putting away some clothes." That was beyond low, but he didn't really feel like thinking up some complicated reason at the moment.

The paperwork on his desk looked so boring and uninviting that Levi felt himself almost gag while looking at it. The paperwork can wait, he thought as he reached inside one of his desk drawers for one of the journals he had kept. He randomly selected one and brought it up onto his desk. He saw that it was Kido's, which was the one with the intricate knot around it.

He opened to the very first page and began reading.

Hello there! I'm pretty sure I'm talking to a book right now... but whatever. This is not a diary, it's a journal. The year is 843 and I've just joined the Scout Regiment. Yay me. I know some people who are really into the saving humanity and the works, but most of the time they don't care much about their own lives. It's a bit worrying, considering one of my friends could be considered apart of that group. She's way too skilled for her own good, and takes too many risks. She's always wanted to fight the titans, and so she's joined the Scout Regiment.

Her name is Cameron Blanc by the way. I really like Cameron. Maybe a bit more than a friend and maybe not. Anyways, we've been friends since when we were children. She can be really nice when she wants to, but most of the time, she's rather cold and distant to people. At least, that's how she looks to outsiders. I've known her for a while though, and can see all of her good qualities. She has raven colored hair that goes down to her shoulders and it's usually in two braids. Cameron is the main reason for me joining the Scouts. I liked her so much, that I didn't think I could stand not seeing her for a long time. Especially the waits I would have to go through. I'd be waiting to see if she was one of the unlucky soldiers who died.

I'm being assigned my squad number and members tomorrow. I hope Cameron is in my squad. I would love to fight alongside her. I also hope that the people in my squad aren't complete assholes and can cooperate. I'll just live with what I get though, I suppose. I mean, what can I do about it?

I don't really see why Cameron likes this writing thing. It hurts my hand and what's the point of this anyways? I don't really want people to read what I've written here, so what's the point in keeping this? I don't know if I'm gonna continue. It just seems like lots of work.

At this point, Levi was basically too engrossed to just set it down and stop reading. He obviously continued, seeing as how there were tons more pages in the thick book. Levi read the next entry.

Well, there's some good news and bad news. So, let's start with the good news. Cameron was assigned to my squad and I got squad number 6. An odd number, but I'm sure I'll grow to love it. The bad news is that I did get some assholes in my squad.

There was a man and a woman that acted kind of distant to everyone else. The rest of the group consisted of me, Cameron, and a nice fellow who went by the name of Blake. Cameron tried getting him into doing this journal thing too, but he said he didn't have time for it. Most likely a polite way of saying, I don't care. Which is fine, not everyone agrees with everyone.

Anyways, a woman named Jessica Lamprey and a man named Kyle Gordon. Well, Jessica didn't really act like an asshole for the most part, she mostly just didn't like interacting with people. She really just acts extremely shy. I'll probably try and help her get over that. Kyle on the other hand, he's just a jerk.

I tried talking to him, and he basically called me a dirty, lowlife peasant. In fact he grabbed my wrist with his shirt sleeve covering his hand when I tried to shake his hand.

"Please refrain from touching me with your filthy hand," he said. What kind of person does he think he is? I'm not giving up though, I'll crack him eventually. By the time I'm done with him, he'll be a really nice and trustworthy person. At least, to our squad.

Levi almost smiled at the description of Kyle. Kyle reminded him of himself. In fact, Kido reminded him of Petra. He wondered for a second if anyone in his squad had kept a journal. Then he started to shake his head and scold himself. Now that was going too far. Levi wondered what the red string marked. It was near the back of the notebook. It would be if he'd been keeping the journal up to date.

He flipped forward in the journal to the place where the red string was.

It's now the year 850. Everything's going fine with me and Cameron now. We made up from the argument we had yesterday. Good thing too, we have to go on an expedition in a couple of days. It'll be the 57th one outside the walls. Just some normal mapping stuff, is what everyone else has been told. It is in fact to capture a female titan, whom Erwin has heard about. Tensions seem to be running high around here and I feel as if people are becoming suspicious of each other. It doesn't feel like that with my squad though.

Kyle has started acting differently toward Jessica, a little bit more friendly you could say. We all trust him now, and he doesn't act like that much of a jerk to us. We can't say that about outsiders though. I'm planning on purposing to Cameron after the expedition. I don't know how I'm going to do it yet, but it's gonna happen.

A boy named Eren Jaeger is said to be able to turn into a titan. It's quite intriguing actually. Titans might be the ones saving us after all. Quite funny really. I think he has good intentions and that we should embrace him. After all, I've seen the boy around and he doesn't look like much of a threat. I've heard that he possesses determination unlike any other, though. Determination and passion don't always translate into talent. I don't know how he'll fight outside the walls, but hopefully he's fighting for humanity.

I'm so worried yet reassured at the same time. I'm not afraid of death, but I'm afraid of my friends' deaths. The thought of me still being alive and having them dead is absolutely awful. If I die though, I know I will have died for the benefit of humanity. Even if it's the smallest push forward, and my death might not look like much in the long run, it will have meant something because I died outside the walls and free.

It was the last entry in the journal. Levi realized that it was the reason that the journal wasn't full yet. Kido often missed out on writing in it. Levi started thinking about how Kido died. From the small amount of stuff he'd read about him, he thought he was a brave and good soldier. He could still hear the sounds of the squad screaming as they died. Eren was yelling at him suddenly to turn around and help them, to save their lives. Levi's mind had been on the trap that they were luring her into, and he was forcing himself not to think about the people that were dying behind him.

He'd only read a small amount of the entries, but he didn't have much time to continue reading before he had to get back to doing his actual work. He looked at the paperwork again with disdain. After setting Kido's journal back down in the drawer, he pushed the paperwork aside leaving enough room for another journal to lay in its place.