Too Little Too Late

Peter Parker

Peter had to go and fight. It wasn't like he could not go. The aliens were attacking his city. And it was still his city, even if he wasn't the friendly neighbourhood Spiderman anymore.

It had been too hard after the civil war. He had just wanted to help but not everybody wanted to be saved apparently. When the police shot him, the message had been more than clear. His life was tumbling down. And when Mr Stark disappeared, Peter felt like a ton of guilt was crashing on him.

The fight in Germany had not gone the way Mr Stark had wanted to. Maybe Peter could have done more. Or maybe it would have been better without him. He didn't know anymore. Being a superhero had been awful and awesome at the same time. He had been at fault for his Uncle Ben's death. Now, he felt the same way all over again. Happy and May were telling him that no, it wasn't his fault nor for Ben or for Tony. But he wasn't entirely convinced.

Normal life was just that. Normal. Same bullying crew, same friends. At night, he could sleep instead of going out patrolling. If the nightmares did not come to haunt him. May wanted him to go to a specialist. He refused. No psychiatrist would understand Spiderman. And maybe they would tell the authorities. The accords weren't meant for underaged enhanced. On television, he saw that King T'Challa was doing a lot with the U.N., he even got a pardon for the Rogues. Peter was an exception. No other superhero teenager had come through yet. Mr Stark wanted to change all that, make them better. He wasn't there anymore.

Mr Stark had wanted him to take things slow regarding Spiderman. Would he be proud now? Or maybe he would be disappointed. The genius had spent a lot of time and money on the suit. Maybe he would want it to be used. Peter was so unsure of everything now. What should he do? What could he do? Everything that had been so simple before, so black and white, was now completely blurry.

Iron Man had always been his favourite superhero. Tony Stark was his goal. He had wanted to become just like him. He was like a light in the dark for Peter. He had never planned to be bitten by a freaky spider. It had felt good to have an example to follow. Even more so when you could look up to him for more than the hero side of things.

Peter would have loved to be an inventor like Tony Stark. Of course, Peter wasn't stupid. He had invented the spider fluid for instance. And he knew that not everything in Mr Stark's life was peachy or even good to follow. Still the man had turned his life around and had been doing a lot of good. It should have counted for something right?

It didn't apparently and now Mr Stark was nowhere to be found. Peter was left with a big hole in his life, not knowing what to do with himself. Until the Chitauri's attack.

After that it was a question of survival. Not only his. The feelings were different though. Before the civil war, Peter had wanted to save everybody, anybody who would had needed help. Like that old lady who bought him churros as a reward once. Now he was fighting mainly to protect Aunt May and Happy, Ned and MJ. He would not put anybody in harm's way on purpose but he didn't really feel the need to save them all like before. Saving strangers who would end up hating you like they did Mr Stark was not that appealing.

But the Chitauri were there now and he didn't really have a choice anymore. He wasn't prepared for that. Nobody could be really ready for a war like that.

Thanos' army seemed infinite and relentless. During the first few days, Captain America liked to give speeches for morals and such. He sounded so sure that Earth would win the war quickly. You couldn't not follow him. No more of that now.

The Quinjet fleet went into space another time. Nobody came back. Thanos would not fall for the same trick twice. Peter had been standing not too fat from the Black Widow when the sad news was announced. She didn't seem to react. As if she wasn't bothered. It sent a chill down Peter's spine.