Life on the Frontlines

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(Cassie's Point of View)

It's about 11:00 AM and I am sitting outside on my balcony enjoying my morning cup of coffee. I can't believe it has already been three weeks since I was discharged from the hospital. The last Three weeks have felt like the longest Three weeks of my life because I haven't had any communication with Luke at all. I knew that during his deployment access to a computer could be limited and unpredictable as we did discuss this when we were talking about how we were going to communicate when we were planning our marriage arrangement. Of course at the time of making our plans that didn't bother me as the less we had to talk the better, as I wasn't exactly looking forward to the video calls and emails but I knew that I had to do it to make this marriage look real. Obviously falling in love, being happily married, and planning for our future together was not something we had talked about so now not being able to talk to Luke is complete torture. These last few weeks have been hard and the worst part is no one knows about Luke except for Riley but I know people are growing suspicious of my behavior because Nora, Toby, and now even my Mom have asked me if I'm alright. I just tell everyone I'm tried but I am going to get to a point where I can't use that as an excuse anymore. On a high note I did get to hang out with Nor and Toby as we wrote and recorded a new song about a week and a half ago called Blue Side of the Sky and we are all really excited about it and I think we are planning on releasing at the end of this week. I have also finished three other songs, but they are about Luke and I haven't shared those with anyone yet because I wanted to share them with Luke first. Riley's coming over in about an hour and we are going to go out for lunch. Recently I have been wondering if Riley knows anything about the health insurance part of Luke and my marriage, I mean she has never said anything but I know she and Frankie are in a very serious relationship so I wouldn't be surprised if she knew. I feel like maybe I should just tell her as I know I can trust her and she is Frankie's other half and well I can't exactly expect Frankie to keep a secret like this from his soon to be fiancé.

(Riley's Point of View)

I am about to head over to Cassie's house because we have plans for lunch. I am so thankful that  I have Cassie to talk to because even though I love some of my childhood friends, they don't really understand how I'm feeling and it's not their fault at all but until you have experienced this I think it's really hard to understand. I have been really anxious the last few weeks because I haven't talked to Frankie since our short 10 minute conversation which was just under a month ago. There is a group chat that was just started a few days ago for the WAGs (wives and girlfriends) of the second platoon. I think we are all going to try and hang out in the next few days as it sounds like everyone is having a bit of a hard time since their unit has been dark for the last 3 almost 4 weeks. I know Frankie had mentioned that their computer access could be spotty and unpredictable but I figured that meant that sometimes our calls would drop or he wouldn't be able to get back to me immediately but I didn't realize it also meant that we might end up going for long stretches at a time without communication. When he was going through the rigorous process of becoming a Marine there were times that we didn't talk for maybe a week or two but the big difference was he wasn't in the middle of a deadly war zone. I think the part about being in the worst war zone in the world is what makes me the most anxious because all we see on this side of things are the news reports about how the fighting in Ramadi and Baghdad just keeps getting worse and I know that Frankie is stationed somewhere right in between those two places which makes it scarier. 

(Cassie's Point of View)

I hear Riley knocking on my door so I walk over to it and unlock it so that I can let her in. As soon as I unlock the door and open it I give her a big hug. We head over to the couch and we sit down and begin talk about things. I then decide I need to come clean with her about the health benefits part of Luke and my marriage so I say "Riley, I have something that I need to tell you about how Luke and I came to be married and while I am not exactly proud of it I want to be honest with you because you deserve that from me." Before I have a chance to continue she says "Cassie, I already know what you are going to say as Frankie told me but I swore not to tell a living soul. I hope you know that neither of us judge you or Luke and we both know you were in an incredibly difficult position and honestly if I was in your shoes I would have done something similar and we are both thankful that Luke agreed and I know that if Frankie was single he would have done the same. I also believe regardless of how things started, what you two have is truly a happy marriage full of passion and deep love for one another and I think you were made for one another and it feels like you are soul mates.  At least that's what I observe when I listen to how you talk about him and I watch and listen to how you interact with one another even when I am just hearing you in the background when I'm talking to Frankie. Honestly, I'm not sure if I have ever seen anything more real and raw than the love the two of you share and you know the day Frankie told me about this he said I know it sounds crazy but in my heart I just have this feeling that this is real and is going to last forever and sooner or later they are going to realize it themselves." I feel a few tears running down my cheek because I feel like a huge weight has been lifted off my shoulders and it's interesting to know how much faith Frankie had in Luke and me from the beginning and that means a lot. I then give her a hug say "Riley, I don't know what I would do without you." She then says "I don't know what I would do without you either, I'm glad we have each other." After we hug it out she says "you know Cass, it means a lot to me though that you wanted to tell me." I then smile and I say "I could never lie to you Riley, I hope you know that." She then smiles and says "I know Cass." I then say "I need your expert opinion on something." She smiles and respond "of course?" I then say "my lease here ends in like 10 days and I am not sure if I should renew it or if I should look for a place with more space because I assume when Luke gets home from deployment we will move in together. I was planning to talk to Luke about it a few weeks ago but since we haven't heard from them in over 3 weeks and we don't know when we will hear from them again I feel like I need to make a decision since it's getting close." She then says "that's a tough one, how much bigger of a place were you thinking about getting?" I then say "well I was thinking about maybe looking for a two bedroom apartment instead because right now I use the bedroom and the living room as a music studio and I figure he might appreciate having a living and bedroom that are not both partial music studios and because there will be two of us I am thinking a little extra space won't hurt. Also I feel like a new place for both of us would be nice given this will be our first place together as a married couple." She then says "honestly, I think he will be happy either way but if you are able to find a place you like that has another room that could be nice and it might be nice to have a place that feels like both of yours as your first place together as husband and wife." I then say "thanks, I think I'll start looking." She then says "if you want help we can go looking today." I then say "sure, that would be great. Thank you!" 

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