mcyt | ONESHOTS

stars will fall - dreamwastaken

based on the song stars will fall by duster ( ish ) :)

you had gotten home late. work was really kicking your ass. who would've thought that kids could cry for that long. i guess that comes with working in childcare. it put you off having kids sometimes, but seeing clay's face gleam everytime a kid passed you both was enough to give you butterflies in your now empty stomach.

you were tired, so tired. exhausted even. clay had just finished streaming some sort of game with his friends and had came downstairs to grab a drink when he saw you. immediately, he went in for a kiss to which, you pushed away, out of instinct. you were too sleepy for kisses. you just wanted to lay in his arms for a while.

" i'm gonna edit some videos " he murmured.

well, that was random. you had assumed that he was tired too, considering that it was at least 3 in the morning. actually, it was probably normal considering how little sleep he got now that he was streaming and posting more often. the time zones to him and his friends never really seemed to line up except for when it was awfully late for him. it wasn't unusual for him to be gone by the time you woke up anymore, but it still hurt the same.

" stay? " you whispered, almost hoping that he didn't hear you out of pure embarrassment. you weren't the clingy kind, not at all. and you knew that, that hurt clay at times. but right now, all you wanted was to be in his arms.
" i'm sorry " you mumbled.

you loved clay, more than you had ever loved anything. which is why what he said after hurt you more than you could imagine.

" go to bed, y/n. " he scoffed.

hurt filled your eyes and you looked up at him just to see his green eyes shallowly staring you down. tears threatened to spill from your eyes but you managed to hold them back.

" what? " you choked out, in a tone so soft that you weren't sure he could hear you.

" you heard me. " his voice was darker than before, filled with anger. he was angry at you? you didn't understand. what did you do wrong. if anything, he was in the wrong! he had been streaming so often that you hadn't had a normal conversation in at least a week, one that didn't involve him babbling on about his plans. it's not as if you didn't enjoy hearing him talk. but he never asked about you. sure, he was overcome with joy, he was happy. but, you were his girlfriend.

instinctively, your hand reached up to touch his face. you wanted answers to his sudden change in demeanour. but you also missed his skin, his touch. you missed him.

to your dismay, he smacked your hand away sooner than you had placed it on his cheek. tears glossed your eyes and you couldn't help but allow one to slide down your face. he could sense that you were hurt. it was right in front of you.

" don't touch me. " he angrily whispered, his voice sounding nothing like yours.
" clay. " you hoarsely let out, to which he scoffed. " what's wrong " you added.

" what's wrong? " he complained. " what's wrong is that you come home late, from god knows where, probably sleeping with god knows who! i try to kiss you and you push me away but now you want my touch huh! now you want me? " his voice had raised now, alarming you. for the first time ever, he had scared you. and not in a playful way. and that was enough for you.

" i was working. " you softly spoke, even though clay was practically shouting at you mere seconds before.
" i told you this morning, clay. "
he was upset now, as tears threatened his eyes. he had messed up and he knew it.
" and before you decided that i was a whore you could've asked me where i was. it's not like you would've cared anyways. i'm sorry for not kissing you clay, but i'm tired okay? work is shit right now, but you wouldn't know that would you? when was the last time we talked about me? i'm glad you're doing well on twitch, seriously, i am. but i am your girlfriend! we haven't spoken properly in what, a week? it's like i'm only here when you choose, even though we literally live together! i love you clay, i love you so much but you know i can't live like this, i can't. it's not fair " you sobbed towards the end, not bothering to keep anything in.

" i-i didn't know " he stuttered, to which you replied with a scoff.

" shit " he muttered.

you wiped your tears, your hand now soaked and tried to head upstairs before he held your wrist, instantly bringing flashbacks to how he would drag you to the ice-cream truck whenever it passed your house, or when he would tug at your wrist when you were looking at pretty flowers and walking too slow for his liking. he pulled you back and now it was his turn to hold your face, he looked desperately into your eyes and although you didn't want to, you melted at his feel.

" i'm so sorry. " he stated.

" it's your job, clay. you make people happy and i'm so content with that but you used to make me happy, of course you still do but it's not the same, is it? " you replied. him nodding along with you, agreeing with what you said.

he knew that he was distancing himself from you and he hated every second of it but he just kept pushing himself. he knew that when he sit a certain milestone he would be able to take a break and then he could spend time with you, take care of you and continue loving you. he just never took into consideration about telling you this. he kept it from you. so, he told you. and you understood. you understood where he was coming from.

the break came a lot sooner than expected, it happened the same evening and you were confused as to whether he made up some milestone or something huge genuinely happened, either way, you were happy about it, very happy. you snuggled into his chest as he was asking about how you were. he was never a bad boyfriend. never. but he was never perfect either, and that can be expected. no matter, because he had soon realised just how much he cared for you, more than he thought or could handle. he wanted to stay with you forever and ever. he never wanted to leave you.

" im sorry for pushing your hand away " he spoke, half asleep but softly this time. " it's not like i didn't want to feel your touch " he added. streaming felt a similar way to him as you felt to him. he felt so passionate about content creation that sometimes he got the feelings of passion and love mixed up. which is why he didn't focus on you enough, because he subconsciously thought he was helping you too.

i hope that was alright, this is my first piece of writing on wattpad, ever!! :))