It's not like I woke up one day and knew exactly what I wanted to do with my life, you know, that is humanly possible. For Pete's sake, when I was younger, I wanted to be a dragon. Or, if that failed, a princess. Yeah, I was so naive. But, I was happy. And, Daddy had told me I could be whatever I wanted. He even bought me a tiara. I wore that thing. Every. Single. Day. You know, until I became too old for it. I think I was eleven. o.o But, then, it wasn't about the dream anymore. It was about not wanting to forget.
There was also a time where my dream was to die young before I knew the pain of heartbreak. You know, before high school. I wanted to go out if a ball of fire, so to speak. I wanted it news worthy, so no one would ever forget Kyle Ezekiel. A young, troubled, pre-teen who had been through to much. I wanted my story told. Because, maybe then people would stop driving drunk. I didn't want anybody else to have to go through what I've gone through. Life is already a pain-filled thing, and no one deserves getting their family torn apart. I don't care who they are.
That was my dream; that was what I hoped my legacy would be. A better tomorrow to make up for yesterday.
Now though? All my hopes and dreams are for a cure. Because, I have lung cancer, and it's going to be the death of me. I could have many long years ahead of me. Or, you know, just a few. I don't want to die anymore. I want to be strong and prove that no matter what gets thrown at me, it's not going to drag me down forever. I have the dream of being able to rise above. To conquer and to help others do so as well.
I guess, you could say that all my hopes and dreams are more for others than myself. World peace, no more hunger, no more discrimination, no more homelessness, no more war. Just...Love.
But, then you'd hear my next wish and realize that I'm just as selfish as everybody else on this God forsaken Earth.
My real hopes and dreams? To have my family be whole again.
That is pure selfishness right there. I'm not caring about how it would help anybody else. I'm just thinking of how it would help me to have a little sister to yell at and a father to ground me. How much it would help me to be able to actually hate my family and wish them gone...Because, at least they'd be there.
-Kyle.
