Meet Me Backstage

35. I Knew You Were Trouble

SKYE

Shit.

Here they are.

Feelings.

This whole time, I've been telling myself that I wouldn't fall too hard. That this was just a bit of fun. That I could handle a casual relationship with Jacks without wanting something more.

I've always been great at lying to myself. One of these days I'm going to learn to stop trusting my lying ass.

I close the door to my room, drop my bag onto the floor, and collapse onto the bed.

This can't be happening.

My throat tightens and I choke back a breath as I search my mind for an explanation.

How could Jacks have a girlfriend? He would have said something, wouldn't he?

I bury my face in my hands, roll over, and scream into a pillow.

Oh god. He did say something. He told me.

When he took the boudoir photos, he said he had someone in mind. He told me he was dating a girl that he had shown the photos to, and at the time I hadn't thought anything of it because I was with Greg.

I'm such an idiot.

All this time, he probably assumed I knew. And why wouldn't I? He literally told me he was seeing someone and here I am making out with him all over the place while his girlfriend is broken-hearted about it.

I'm a garbage person.

I knew I was in too deep. I knew the rumors about Jacks sleeping around. But I ignored them, because I couldn't imagine the Jacks I knew playing with people's hearts like that. I was so sure they had it wrong. But I got played.

Played.

Playboy.

That's what Sticks always calls him. Literally everything around me has been telling me this entire time.

I can't even be mad, really. He was honest with me. He told me up front that he was seeing someone. Heck—I was seeing someone when we met and he kept flirting with me.

What is wrong with me? Do I have a fucking lifetime supply of cluelessness or what?

I start to hyperventilate and my eyes fill with tears.

I knew better and I fell anyway. I got caught up in the whirlwind that is Jackson Ford and I succumbed to the charm. And I have no one to blame but myself.

I need to talk to him without letting my hormones run the show. I need to know if it's true, and I can't just believe a tabloid without hearing it from him.

After drying my eyes and doing my best to look like I haven't been crying, I make my way to Jacks's room and reach out to knock. Before my knuckles hit the door, I hear his muffled voice on the other side.

"I have always said red is your color," he says.

It seems like he's talking to someone, and curiosity has gotten the best of me. I stop for a moment and find myself eavesdropping. After a moment, he speaks again.

"You know I'd do anything for you, doll."

My heart sinks and my stomach churns.

Oh my god. He's talking to her.

If I knock now and she answers the door, I think I might just die right here in the hall. Tears prick my eyes and I bite my lips shut.

Who was I kidding? Did I really think someone like Jacks would seriously be interested in me?