The night without the moon

Dealing with the past

"Where have you been?" Chan-sung questioned Aera as he noticed her entering the hotel. His voice was calm, despite his blood boiling with fury and worry. Fury for the CEO's actions and worry for those who would be forced to hurry their departure or risk staying in this world and wandering until they either found their salvation or their doom.

"I visited my parents," Aera answered. "Sorry if you were worried."

"You should have told me." He cried. None said a thing. Then, he continued in a calmer tone: "How are they doing?"

"They still don't get along, but I missed them. I miss a lot of things that I once took for granted. But don't worry, I'll be alright. I guess." It was the first time since he'd become manager he saw her so miserable. Just a few hours ago she'd been so full of life and energy, but when you are far from those you love, you don't need a particular reason to sense their absence, do you?

"Do you want me to speak with them or...I don't know, ...anything you need?" Chan-sung suggested.

"I don't know what I should tell them."

"You can visit them in their sleep. There's a special...."

"What good it will do..." she uttered disappointed..

"Do you have any idea how difficult it is to be left behind? At least, tell them you are happy and they shouldn't worry for you." He hadn't intended to sound so harsh, but this topic had triggered some strong emotions inside of him. He knew how it felt to be left behind. To struggle every day to go on with a life that resembled a broken machinery.

"Chan-sung, I" she started. "....could you tell them that for me?"

"Sure."

"My mother hated to be poor." Aera started her story a few hours later as Chan-sung joined her on the sky lounge. "She wasn't meant to live like that. She'd been born to be a lady. I remember when I was very young, she was so beautiful, so lady like with her high heels, ivory skin and long nails. I've always dreamed to be like her, but I was a disaster on wearing high heels and clothes have never suited me as well as they did her. I guess some people are born to be ladies. I wasn't. Poverty forced her to work like a slave. She was..is very hardworking. Even if she's been born to be a lady. So, she started to blame others for her misfortune. My grandparents, my father, even me. I've always felt like I stood in her way. That she'd invested so many money on me, money she could have used for herself. As I grew older I started to feel guilty. She kept reminding me, every time she was upset, that everything I managed to achieve was due to their support. I..just...I just wanted just once to feel that I did something by my own. So, I tried to be as independent as I could."

"You have your own business. You've made it by yourself." Chan-sung encouraged her. He was right. She'd created the business from scratch.

"I got good grades. Gave my best to be the top in my class. I even got a good job. Maybe, not the best and I wasn't the smartest, but I had a bright future ahead. And yet I kept feeling guilty. The money I earned weren't enough to be completely independent and, honestly, I didn't know what I really wanted. A part of me yearned for the beautiful memories we had together. I wanted to spend as much time as I could with me family. Another part of me was scared that things would turn evil and all the happiness and the peace would be gone in seconds. I learned that if something was beautiful it wasn't meant to last."

"Have you told them all those things?" He asked her, trying to help.

"I was afraid of what I might cause if I were to be that honest. So, I never dared to do. And I was..and I was supposed to be grateful for everything I got as some people weren't as lucky as me."

"Well, I didn't meet my mother while she was alive. As a ghost, there weren't many things we could say each other. She'd never wanted me. I respected her wish and I made sure her family and her friends never learned about my existence. My father was a thief. He did bad things, but he changed his life and became a better man. Even if he sold me to Mrs. Jang, he loved me. He really did."

"I may be an ungrateful kid. I just wanted to mean something. I didn't want to be a disappointment."

"Do you want me to tell your parents all those things?" He asked sympathetic.

"I don't know what I want anymore. What good it will do? Anyway, it's over for me. I can't return even if I wanted to."

"I'm sorry. For everything you've been through." Chan-sung uttered as he noticed tears in her eyes. "You should go and face your next life. I hope we'll meet again. We'll make good friends."

"What if I'm not going to remember you? What if we wouldn't meet?" She voiced her fears.

"I'm sure we will. Maybe not in the next life. Maybe not the life after that, but we'll eventually meet. I'm sure of that. But staying her. Allowing grief and remorse consume you, this will ruin your soul."

"I killed myself. How could I pass on? I won't be reincarnated. I'm sure of that." She looked in his eyes, hoping he would contradict her even if it were a lie.

"You might pay a price for it, but it will be alright in the end."

"No, I can't go alone. I'm afraid. Too afraid."

A loud noise echoed in the air and lots of colourful fireworks filled the sky. Inside the hotel, they'd all lost the track of time. Chan-sung hadn't had time to go home. He remembered he'd got a call from Sanchez to wish him Merry Christmas a few days ago. Probably a week ago. But he'd forgotten completely.

"I should call Sanchez and wish him Happy New Year." Chan-sung said as he watched the spectacle.

"Another year is gone." She uttered melancholically. "I don't know why this makes me nostalgic. I'm dead. Why do I care about it? They're too loud." She complained trying to hide her tears. Chan-sung didn't say anything. "I didn't have many friends." She continued. "I usually started the New Year alone or at a boring dinner with all my relatives. They would keep gossiping about everyone and criticize every breath of air you took. I hated those gatherings."

"You should celebrate it here. I was so busy lately that I forgot. Next year, we'll have a Christmas tree, too. I promise. Come. Let's have a toast with the guests."

Soon the hotel echoed with lots of voices chanting "Happy New Year". They partied, danced and spoke about their former New Year parties while they were alive.

"Sometimes, I wonder if you are a ghost too." Sanchez scolded Chan-sung as he finally called him.

"My CEO is a jerk and I have to do everything alone. I've lost the track of the time. Happy New Year, Sanchez." Chan-sung excused himself.

"Are you ever going back? We miss you."