Love Story? Maybe Not.

Chapter 3. Enough about the past.

Dear friend,

First I wanted to say thank you for reading this, it means a lot that finally someone is listening.

Ok, so now you know pretty much all you need to know about the past, maybe it's time we start on the present. I'll write about my days? Probably now you've guessed from "a complete mess" I'm not hooked on a guy who'll never come back, that it was something a little bit more than that.

Stefan sent me back to depression...

Don't worry I haven't done anything yet! I only cry myself to sleep thinking about what happened, blaming myself for it, you could say I just take it all out on myself. But no one seems to have noticed me. They all sort of put it down to missing him and time on my own will help, wow they are so wrong...

It's the last week of Year 9, yeah I know I'm only young and shouldn't be going through all this now blah blah blah, but I know that already you don't have to tell me.

But right now I feel more alone than ever, thinking about cutting, thinking that everyone would be better if I walked infront of that bus, or that car, or jumped off that bridge, no one would notice I was gone, no one notices that I'm even here so why not?

Sat in History, on my own as usual, all of my 'friends' sitting together, but no room for me, so I sat on the table at the back, my hoodie covering my arms, and colouring in a World War II poster we had been making for about about 2 weeks, every so often putting down the pen and scratching my wrist, staring into space.

That lesson went so slow... But finally the bell went and the teacher said we could leave.

I didn't look at my arm until I got out of the classroom, it was red and swollen... Yeah not good... But my hoodie covers it so I'll be fine...

Phoebe x