tacenda.

Thanks for the pizza!

"So there was no way I was going to take her shift, y'know? I don't want to be working any more than I have to. If you don't like your job that's all well and good, but don't assume others do."

You were frantically clicking away on your controller, it was a wonder it hadn't broken yet. Your eyes were laser focused on your TV screen, you were doing a good amount of damage as Kitana, but your opponent kept dodging. It was 10 pm and you needed a win.

What? You had to feel validated somehow.

"hey, i get what yer saying, pal. it's not worth it, why stay longer at work when ya could hang out with me?"

You laughed, but didn't look away from the screen. You were so close to winning! Sans was passively cheering you on from the couch, leaving no room for you of course.

Lazy bastard.

Clicking sounds continued to be heard, only growing louder in noise as the match prolonged. A combo here, a grab there and then... !

'Finish him!'

"YES! I DID IT! FINALLY! I WON!" You jumped for joy, completely forgetting about the poor controller who also deserved some credit. It was not given, sadly.

You needed to grab, squeeze and/or hug something. Your hands were shaking and the dopamine rushing through your brain was getting too much to handle. Sans, your victim, got the soul squeezed out of him.

In spite of this, all he did was pat your back. "great job buddy, guess they were no match for ya. You had total control."

You let him go, and sat down on your living room carpet, knowing full well that you friend would reclaim what he called his 'rightful place'. You did not deign his joke deserving of an answer.

"I couldn't have done it without my personal cheerleader," You raised your brow. "I'd even say you almost put in some effort."

He gasped and clutched at his blue jacket, as if shot. "my own friend, insultin' me to my face, say it ain't so!" He continued to act like a drama queen for all of five seconds, when your doorbell rang. The facade dropped. You were confused, was something wrong?

He teleported over to the door, you couldn't make out what was being said. You did see Sans reach into one of his pockets. A few seconds passed and he made his way back to you with his hands behind his back.

You were kinda getting worried, the grave expression on his face wasn't doing your anxiety any favors. "What's wrong? Was there a problem or something?"

He grinned, and suddenly you wanted to facepalm. "pizza's here." He appeared on your couch and opened the pizza box, it smelled heavenly.

"Did you pay for this?"

"dug into my life's savings just for you, buddy. ya owe me."

What a bonehead. You grabbed a slice. "You? Paying for something? Who are you, and what have you done with Sans the freeloader?"

"hey, it's 'the skeleton' and ya know it." You began eating your meal.

Yummy.

"I only call you by your most relevant title."

He waxed poetic about how you kept bullying him, and only stayed around for free entertainment.

"Dude, who are you, Mettaton?"

He stopped talking, instead choosing to stare at you as if you had offended several generations of his skeleton ancestors. As if you had committed the highest possible offense.

It was hilarious.

"... if you ever say anythin' remotely close to the garbage that came out of your mouth just now, i'm teleportin' out of here, and never returnin'. take it back."

You would apologize, if you were anyone else and didn't know Sans as well as you did. You could see his eyes almost crinkle. He wasn't pulling the wool over yours this time, neither literally nor figuratively.

"As if, who's couch would you hog then? Who would scam you into buying McDonald's ketchup packets?"

He placed the pizza on top of your coffee table, letting you grab two more pieces, and made himself comfortable once more. He made a show of weighing his options, seemingly struggling to choose one over the other. The end result was not surprising.

"ya do make a good point, alright. i'll forgive ya for yer transgressions." Then he looked at you with an expectant expression.

You didn't get it at first, which was understandable. The joke came out of nowhere, just when you'd let your guard down, he striked. It seemed to be how most of his jokes were told.

Really, does he just go online everyday to find more jokes to tell?

"W-really? I... I just don't know what to say anymore, dude." Instead, you ate more pizza. Food was the answer to all your problems right now, well...

Not all.

"wow, looks like i've left ya speechless. didn't know that was even possible anymore."

That was true, you had known Sans for a while now. Almost nine years, in fact. So even though he always had new material up his sleeves, you had grown immune and had eventually stopped giving a satisfying reaction. He made it his personal goal to get you to make a face at his jokes again, like in the past. This had mixed results, you're sure he counts today as a win.

You smiled. "Guess we'll have to hang out even more, otherwise it'll happen again."

There was only one slice of pizza left. "wouldn't that be the end of the world, don't go losin' a pizza yerself." You weren't surprised that time, you were honestly wondering when he would use that one. Then you heard the tell tale sound of Sans' phone ringing, you knew it was his because he had this weirdly catchy tune he used, made by a fairly unknown composer.

His name was... something to do with radiation?

"lemme sea who it is." He picked up. "Knock knock, who's there?"

What followed were a couple seconds of silence and Sans giving one word answers. He began gathering his things. (read: the pizza box) He offered you the last slice while his magic held up his phone close to his skull. You denied, whispering that he could take it home. Maybe Papyrus would eat it?

Meh, probably not, but if he didn't, Sans would.

He hung up, and told you he had to go home. You gave him the go-ahead and wished him a safe journey.

"See you next time, Sans. Say hi to Papyrus for me!"

"'till next time, bud. don't worry, i always do."

He blinked out of existence, and you turned off your console. It was a fun night, but you needed to go to sleep. You had work.

You cleaned up a little, making sure all unneeded outlets were unplugged as well. No need to be losing money. Looking around, your apartment was clean enough for now. You changed into your pj's, did your nightly routine, and crawled into bed.

You pretended not to hear the shouting outside.