Joseph Quinn Imagines (Joseph x Y/N)

32. Out of place.

Silence. The only sound to be heard was the car radio. Joe's attempts of talking had died down 5 minutes into the journey realising he was being ignored. Tonight started off so amazingly and giving him the silent treatment by the end of the night was not intended but it was definitely necessary.

Joe and i had been to one of his friends game night which at first seemed like so much fun that was until puzzle pieces started clicking together. Lucy was there. That name was really familiar.. Who was Lucy? Only his ex who he seemed to still be really good friends with. His other friends seemed to like me and seemed to want to get to know me except for her. Her only interest was talking to Joe. We all played a game of monopoly which was fun but it was when it was over that things took a turn. After the game had finished i had went to go to the toilet then went to the kitchen to grab another drink when i heard Joe and Lucy's voices through the gap of the door.

"I wonder if you will let her stick around longer than 6 months" Lucy laughed. "I think i will, it seems to be going well, were already at 7 months" Joe replied. That was tug on a heart string. 'Think' surely that's something you would know. I just returned back to the living room deciding to leave my drink and sitting, talking to his friends. 15 minutes later Joe came back in and joined us asking if I wanted to leave, i didn't reply just nodded. I said goodbye to his all of his friends before walking towards the car waiting to get in.

I got inside and placed my head against the window turning away from him. He placed his hand on my thigh. "Tired?" He asked. I didn't reply i just looked at his hand waiting for him to remove it which he almost instantly got the hint. "Did you enjoy tonight?" He asked trying to make conversation i just turned my head more to look outside. He tried asking a couple more questions but it soon died down realising i wasn't replying.

We reached his apartment and i walked right to the bedroom to grab myself some clothes. I choose some shorts and a oversized hoodie. Joe walked into the room not long after me i proceeded to go to the bathroom to get changed and do my skin care. As i walked out he was lay in bed waiting for me. Instead of getting into bed i grabbed my book from the nightstand and sat on the chair at the kitchen counter top. I made a cup of coffee sitting down reading when Joe came out to see what i was doing. "Are you not coming to bed?" He asked. I tried to carry on reading my book but he came to stand opposite me. "Y/N please talk to me, what's wrong love?" He pleaded. I placed my bookmark in my book before placing it down. I let out a deep breath. "Just go to bed Joe" i said finally meeting his eyes. He looked hurt that the first thing i had said in the past hour was trying to get his presence away from me.

"Y/N/N, I don't want to end tonight with you being upset and not talking to me, please tell me what's wrong so i can at least try and make it right." I let out a huff standing up to grab a glass of water trying to do anything to not cry. "Joe I don't want to talk right now." I said with my back to him, he came behind me holding my wrist to turn me to face him. i turned to face him but shook his hand off. "Please im begging you to talk to me, at least tell me what's wrong" he begged.

"You know what the problem was? Lucy, tonight revolved around her. You spent basically the whole time we were there talking to her forgetting i was there, you thought keeping your hand on my thigh was enough but joe i can hardly remember 2 words you said to me. You introduced me to your friends and just let me sit and talk to a group of people i didn't know. I've never felt more out of place in my life." I paused feeling tears streaming down my face. I was starting to get more and more angry with each word having to think about the night over and over again. "And you know what the worst part of it was, hearing you say you 'think you will let me stick around' Joe if your not sure if this is serious or what you want let me know because I'm fucking done, ill walk out of this apartment right now and not look back." I ranted with tears streaming down my face.

He looked shocked remembering his own actions. "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry i made you feel like that, I didn't even realise-" he started before i cut him off. "No you didn't realise because all of your attention was on your ex" i shouted, my blood was boiling at this point. "I- I'm really sorry, can you sit down so we can talk please?" I shook my head no. "What even is there to talk about, do you want me here because ill leave if you don't" tears started forming in his eyes. "Of course i do, i love you. Y/N/N you're the best thing that's ever happened to me I don't know what id do without you." I wiped the remaining tears off my eyes. "You have a hard way of showing that" i let out a breath trying to calm down. "Just go to bed Joe we can talk about this in the morning, I'm done with this conversation." I said softly.

"I don't want to leave tonight on argument." I just shook my head. "It will be worse the longer you stay please just leave me alone for a while." He nodded a tear escaping his eyes as he turned to walk to the bedroom. "I love you" he said barely above a whisper. I didn't reply i just nodded as he closed the door to the bedroom.

Now it was just me and my thoughts. I started reading but my brain just couldn't focus. I drank some more coffee and cried. It was going to be a long night. I placed my head in my hands letting my thoughts run wild. It felt like i had been there for an hour or so when in reality it had been 5 hours and the sun was now coming up. I decided to sit on the apartment balcony and watch the sunrise with a cup of coffee.

Not too long later the door opened to the balcony with Joe stood there with tears streaming down his face. As soon as our eyes met he covered his face with his hands before he started sobbing. "I.. i thought you... left I'm sorry.. I'm so so sorry" he said between sobs, muffled by his hands. I placed my cup on the small table outside, using my hand to pull him closer pulling him into a hug.

Yes i was still upset but seeing him this upset hurt a lot more. His arms wrapped around me pulling me impossibly close as if, if he let go i would be gone forever. I rubbed his head in a soothing manner staying like that for a while before pulling away. He pulled me to sit on his knee rather than letting me sit on the other chair opposite him. "I really thought you left when i heard the door close." I shook my head as a reply to him not knowing how to reply. "I really am so sorry about last night, i wish i could rewind it all and not even go, i regret making you so upset and feeling out of place especially to my ex. What was i even thinking?" I shrugged my shoulders. "I don't know" i whispered.

"Do you still love me? you didn't reply last night when i said it to you.." he asked, sadness laced in his voice. "I do, you have to understand i was mad and upset last night." I replied. "Say it. Please." He begged. "Joseph, i love you so much. You may be a dumbass sometimes but for as long as you'll have me you will always be my dumbass." I smiled at him. "Forever, i want my forever with you. I never want to have the thought of losing you ever again." He said a tear coming down his face, i used the sleeve of my sweater to wipe it. "Then forever it will be" i said placing my head in his neck pulling him close. "I really am sorry though" he said placing a small kiss on my head. "I know i believe you, just don't pull that shit again because it hurt a lot" he squeezed me pulling me as close as possible. "I promise i wont, I never want to hurt you again."

I sat up, looking him in the eyes and stuck my pinky out for him to take. He swirled his pinky around mine and pulled me closer. He placed a long meaningful kiss on my lips. "I love you Y/N" he said pulling away from the Kiss. "And i love you".