Lonely.

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TW: Self harm! Please read with caution. This is set right before the gang of secrets episode. In this story Marinette never tells Alya her secret.

"That villain was too easy. I think Shadowmoth must be getting lazy. If we track him down right now I bet we'd have a much better chance of winning with his guard down," Ladybug said as she leaned to the side with her hands above her head to stretch. "Right now we're only fighting back the symptoms of his plague on Paris. We need to be curing the city of him for good."

Chat Noir grabbed her wrist to stop her before she could swing away on her yoyo. "Woah Ladybug, you don't have time to fight another villain. You'll transform back soon," he reminded her just before her earrings beeped again. "Maybe lets save defeating Shadowmoth for another day?"

Ladybug was glad she was facing away from Chat Noir so he couldn't see her suppress a flinch. "Then I'll feed my kwami and transform again. You should too."

"Milady, are you okay?"

Ladybug groaned with faux annoyance to keep herself from crying. "Jeez, come on Chat Noir. You asked me that yesterday and I said I was fine."

"Yeah but it's just, I don't know, I feel like something bad happened and you're just not telling me."

Her earrings beeped again, the second to last warning she would get before transforming back. "That's because I can't tell you Chat! I can't tell anyone! No one can know who we are. In order for our secret to stay a secret we have to be alone. We have to lie to and hurt the people we're trying to save everyday until Shadowmoth is defeated," she snapped. She turned her head away from him again and gently pulled free of his grip on her wrist. "I have to go."

As she swung away, Chat Noir didn't try to stop her again. And she was grateful, for if he had, her resolve may have broken and she might have stayed there, on the Eiffel Tower, until she transformed back. It would have been a relief to have anyone know who she was at that point, even Chat. She just needed someone to talk to.

Marinette flopped down onto her bed with a sigh as her transformation wore off. She handed Tikki a macaroon and rolled over to close her eyes. Her heart felt heavy in her chest, like gravity was trying to pull it out through her ribs.

"Marinette..." Tikki started in concern after she had swallowed her first bite.

"I'm just tired Tikki."

Marinette only went downstairs for breakfast the next morning because if she hadn't, her parents would know something was wrong. Explaining what was wrong meant giving up her secret identity, and that couldn't happen. So she had to pretend she was fine. She held it together through the meal, all the plates had been picked up except hers. She even held it together through saying she was eating slower because she had a stomach ache. But all of a sudden, after her parents had gone down to the bakery, it became impossible to pretend any longer and she began to cry into her half eaten crepe. At first Tikki didn't notice the liquid spilling easily from the lip of her bottom eyelid, but then Marinette sniffled and spiraled into outright sobbing.

"Marinette!" Tikki exclaimed with concern. "What's wron-"

"Tikki, spots on!"

Ladybug didn't care much that her parents could have seen her swing away from the bakery, she didn't care that she was skipping school, or even how she would explain why she wasn't there. She just wanted away from it all. She was so, very tired of being lonely.

.

Adrien couldn't focus at school that morning. He kept spacing out with his eyes trained out the window across the classroom. He knew his father would be upset with him if he received a bad score on the next quiz, but he just couldn't get his thoughts to stray away from Ladybug. She had been acting strange lately. She sounded like he had felt when his heart had been freshly broken by her. He didn't want his lady to have to go through that alone, like he had.

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