Cedric shakes his head and his fluffy, perfect hair does the classic hair flip. Harry was mesmerized with fear, looking at his big fat dawgs people call toes.
Cedric was oblivious to Harry's staring, but he walks past Harry thinking of how good of a FRIEND he is. Just standing there with no point in life, Harry wiggled his delicious looking dawgs at Cedric as Cedric walked by. This causes Cedric to vomit in his mouth and run to his next class, super embarrassed. Cedric had liked Harry from the moment he met him and his dawgs, and laughed at every joke Harry made.
But now Cedric has fallen out of love with Harry and his dawgs, he is now fallen in love with Tom Riddle and his tongue. The slippery slick of the tongue reminded him of his scrumptious, delicious, ass-of-a-man father. Cedric had enjoyed the time-turner he had received so he could make out with Tom Riddle back in 1945. Cedric and Tom were just like Ken and Barbie, Cedric being Ken and Tom being Barbie.
Hermione had once walked in on them making out after going to the wrong time period with her own time-turner, but oh my gosh she had never shipped anyone harder in her life. After that moment, she took a photo of their make-out session and gave them to all the teachers, including Professor Dumbledore as she smirked at him. Hermione especially loved how Tom and Cedric looked like brothers when they kissed, and she hoped that someday Draco and Ron would do that to her.
Cedric and Tom's love was passionate, yet deadly. In fact, Cedric could've sworn he heard Tom planning to kill him during their 'meetings'. And there was another instance where Cedric saw Tom wiggle his booty to another girl named Myrtle. Cedric was heartbroken, he ran to Hermione for comfort but that's when he had realized her beauty was much more, and so now instead of dating just Tom and Cho, he was dating Hermione as well. Tom and Cho never knew about this, for if they ever found out about it, they would piss on a stick and give it to their professors to sniff for Valentine's Day.
Hermione knew Cedric was dating Tom and Cho, as she was also now dating Draco but not yet Ron (her plan was being set). As for the relationship between Cedric and Tom, they loved to sniff each other's dawgs and crap on each other's pillows like animals. Although the other never knew their pillow was pooped on because Draco often ate it right off the pillow! He thought it was the most scrumpdelicious meal that it even beat all his fancy, rich bi-atch meals at his mansion. Although his cousins, Jacey, Lacey, and Tracey often ate his fancy, lancy, trancy, jancy, nancy meals at his place. His parents did not appreciate it, as they worked long and hard (not really) to make his fancy, lancy, trancy, jancy, nancy meals. This distanced Draco from his parents and so when you heard him say "my father will hear about this," he actually meant his daddy Hermione. Hermione always loved when mommy Draco would call her a "mudblood" as it was true that she was dirty..... blood. In Hermione's opinion the weasels (Weasley's) had the dirtiest of all blood from being POOR. Hermione wasn't that much richer than the weasels, but she still thought she was superior. Yet anytime her neighbor (Richard) who went by the name Ricky, (HSMTMTS) she makes out with him so much due to his charming love songs. His voice was angelic, just like his dawgs which she loved.
Little did they all know, Lord Voldemort wanted to kill Tom Riddle, as Tom Riddle was the core of love and everything beautiful and Balding Voldemort was the opposite. Another objective to Lord Voldemort wanting to kill Tom Riddle was that Tom Riddle's dawgs were prettier. NONETHELESS THE EQUESTRIAN GIRLS WERE HERE TO SAVE THE DAY, AND THEY WOULD NOT LET TOM RIDDLE DIE ON THEIR WAIT SO THEY SURROUNDED HIIM IN A UMBREAKABLE RAINBOW BARRIER FOR LOVE. Lord Baldy Voldy was flabbergasted by their "UMBREAKABLE RAINBOW BARRIER FOR LOVE" that he twerked on their barrier while letting one rip, therefore breaking the "UMBREAKABLE RAINBOW BARRIER FOR LOVE". The fart was so bad that it grew and enclosed everyone in the atmosphere, it was like a snowglobe but with a fart lingering in the air that killed the equestria girl's magic. The equestria girls twerked to get rid of the fart fog, flexing all their dawgs at him.
Draco thought their dawgs and pony butt tails were the H*ttest thing, E V E R, he really just did say 'Screw you mudblood(s), I like the ponies". Hermione was dumbfounded by his reaction to their greasy dawgs, she flexed her middle dawg at him and broke up with him. Hermione only had greasy dawgs because of the one time she licked Snapes greasy dawgs and found it delicious and had been making sure hers were just as greasy ever since as a treat for herself. Snape has let so many people suck on his juicy, crunchy, greasy dawgs and that inspired so many people to have greasy dawgs as well, therefore creating the best trend there possibly was. The Octopuss Sucker Zuckerberg Dawg trend, where you kiss each individual dawg and then on each individual like a blinking for at least 5 seconds but most people go hours. It became a very big fetish for so many greasy, luminous people.
~~~~
Although there was someone who couldn't stand dawgs, that was Neville Longbottom who hated anything about anyone, except for memories... Neville and Luna Lovegood got along well since they both hated dawgs and therefore, cut off all their dawgs before they attended Hogwarts. Luna and Ginny were in love, Luna thought it'd last forever BUT THEN Ginny left her after she had her dawgs cut off and she has been heartbroken ever since.
"UwU" Draco Malfoy shouts on top of Mt.Everest, while wearing his favorite maid dress, Skeleton mask, and cat ears.
To be continued, ya dawgs!
