Showing Her The Ropes

Chapter 22: The Turning Point

Throwing back the covers with a frustrated sigh, Gwen sat up on the edge of the bed and glanced over her shoulder at Peter, who was still sound asleep. It was the middle of the night and try as she might, she just couldn't sleep. Checking once more to make sure that he hadn't woken up, she got to her feet and tiptoed across the room towards the door. She placed her hand over the catch to muffle the clicking sound as she opened it and did the same as she closed it behind her. Continuing down the stairs, she headed over to the back door and sat down on the steps on the back porch. Taking a deep breath of the cold night air, she looked up at the stars strewn across the pitch black sky and gave a weak smile.

With everything that had been going on recently, she'd barely had any time at all to think about her family, but now... In the dead of night, when all is quiet and there is no fighting, the horror was fresh in her mind. Every time she'd attempted to close her eyes, she found herself back in the family apartment, following the blood trail and finding one of Harry's biggest sins. It was a pain that she knew would always be there and all she could do was attempt to get over it. Wake up every morning, force the pain onto the back burner and focus on her new life. The life she'd chosen for herself with Peter; the life of a superhero.

"Gwen..." She heard her name spoken softly.

She gasped and turned around quickly. Having not expected anyone to come out here since she was the only one awake, she quickly made herself somewhat presentable and focused her attention on who'd spoken.

"I thought that you were still asleep." She mumbled.

"I was... Until I felt you get out of bed and leave the room." Peter informed her.

"Oh... I'm sorry, I didn't mean to wake you." She said, wrapping her arms around herself to keep warm as the cold began to nip at her.

"Meh, don't worry about it. Sleep is for the elderly." He quipped.

"Well, we should probably at least try to get some sleep before the night sky disappears." She stated, reaching for the door.

"Gwen..." He called.

"What?" She questioned.

"I know." He said vaguely.

"You know what?" She asked, raising an eyebrow.

"That you've been struggling when all is said and done and everything is silent." He elaborated.

"Peter..." She began.

"No, it's okay. I understand the way you feel and I know why, but I don't resent you for it. While I didn't choose to have these powers, I did choose to be someone that the city depends on and despite my decision, I sometimes feel pretty crappy about things myself, so I want you to know that it's okay to have a shred of regret at times." He interjected.

Gwen let her hand fall back down by her side and sat back down on the porch steps, patting the empty space next to her for him to sit besides her. He looked towards the door for a brief second and then sat down beside her.

"I don't regret it at all." She informed him.

"You don't have to hide it from me, I can see it in your eyes." He pushed.

"I'm not hiding anything. Peter, whatever it is that you see in my eyes... It isn't regret. I don't regret this lifestyle, I don't regret anything that has happened between us and I sure as hell do not regret being with you. Does that mean I wouldn't change anything? No, because if I'm being fully honest there is one thing I would change... But it's not you or us. The only thing I regret... That I would change is how much we both have lost." She declared.

Peter stared at her as she spoke and he could tell just by the way that she looked up at the stars that she was being sincere. He tore his eyes away and followed her stare up to the sky, where he focused on one little star in particular; larger than the rest, and brighter too.