Self harm, mentions of rape, and mentions of suicide!
Angst to Fluff
Future!AU (Edd and Matt didnt make it)
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Tords POV
Anger surged through my body, letting the cold metal go over my wrist. One. Two. Three.. I lost count eventually, blood spilling from my arm. I sat on the bathroom floor, throwing my head back and letting it hit the wall behind me. Letting out quiet, broken, sobs. I couldnt help but hate myself and everything I'm doing and just did, I feel pathetic, an army leader, who has seen the world, fought death.. can hardly handle it. My friends oh my dear friends, they were gone because of me, I had Tom by my side, after threats and empty promises. This boy, was not who I once knew, he was quiet, attentive, quick to follow orders. Nothing like MY Tom. The Tom who scuffled with me, leaving us bloodied and bruised, then watching movies by the end of the night laughing.
I shoved my face into my arms, I could hardly feel the stinging in my arm, but I feel the blood running down, cold from the air hitting it.
"Red, sir" I quieted down, i couldnt allow him to see my like this. I knew if i spoke the tears would flow and I wouldnt be able to hold it all back "sir. I'm picking up your heat signature, you're distressed and injured. Let me in". I wiped my face, what would they think? What would everyone think of the red army leader, cutting himself and crying alone in his bathroom. Pitiful, a laughing stock I would be.
The door unlocked and there stood Tom, his navy suit, with checkered patches on each side of his arm as well as the red army symbol. His electronic eyes, blinked at me, lidded and colored teal. Each color had an emotion, though this is one I'd never seen before, or at least I didnt program it. He didnt make any comment, he just dug into my medical cabinet, grabbing gauze, bandages, medical tape.. and more.. but I stopped paying attention. He never said a word, this wasnt my Tom. I hiccuped and laid my head down in shame, letting the tears fall.
Tom just stared at me, kneeling down and begging to wrap and tend to my wounds, so careful and gentle with me. I want him to hurt me, I want him to ruin me like I ruined him. I dont deserve I dont deserve. I DONT DESERVE HIM
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I couldnt think, I could hardly breathe, my chest was pounding and I was shaking "Hey! Hey look around what do you see" I shook trying my hardest to focus. "Erm... hah..hh" I looked around and saw a bottle of ibuprofen along side rubbing alcohol "bottles... bottles". "Good, what are in them?" "Ghh m...Ibuprofen, rubbing alcohol" "good good.." my breathing slowed, his thumb rubbing the palm of my hand. "What else? Keep going" instead of that plain look he always wore, there was one painted with worry, his eyes still teal "your... spikey hair?" He let out a small laugh.. oh I havent heard that in a while.
He gently grabbed my arm, pulling me off the floor "come on sir, let's head to your quarters." I nod, rolling my sleeves over the bandages and letting him walk me to the elevator.. the sound of clacking from my steel-toed boots tapping against the tile. He walked in, pressing the button for the top floor, he let go of my arm, running his hand down it as he pulled away. The doors shut in front of us as the elevator began its ascend. "Why do you want to kill yourself?" Straight forward. Straight to the point. My Thomas.
I was... AM a leader, I cant allow myself to be weak, especially in front of a man I broke down and destroyed until he was as weak as he can get to have under my control. But still somehow, my mouth opened as tears spilled from my face. "For what I did. To you. To them" I dug my metallic hand into my fleshed one, practically crushing it. He gently moved my arm from myself and looked at me "I know. I know you do. And I dont.... I dont forgive you. But I know you're changing" I couldnt look at him. I hiccuped and wiped my face with my sleeve, the door dinged and opened. My personal suite was very large, he led me straight to my room, making me sit on my bed as he sat beside me. I collapsed onto him, crying whilst wrapping my arms around him tightly "IM SORRY! IM SORRY!". He ran his hand on my back, shushing me and holding me close.
We used to be in love once, and I held him just like this. When he broke up with his girlfriend, I remember his wrists slit, scared to death of me touching him, let alone his body. But we grew closer and fell in love. Only for it to break apart when I decided to build up the army. Oh how foolish I was.
He kept attempting to soothe me, whispering words to my deaf side, so it's not like I could hear but i feel like that may be the point. He pulled back from me and held my cheek, laying a gentle kiss on my lips. "I.. I didnt mean to kill them I didnt mean to I didnt I didnt" I buried my face into his neck, continuing to ramble and he didnt say a word. He just held me, he still wore the same cologne.. same shampoo.. nastolgia flooding me.
"I'm sorry.." I whispered
He kissed my forehead and laid back, bringing me down with him. He scratched the back of my head and played with my hair.
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I woke up to no one beside me. I cried realizing it was a dream before I looked down to my wrists, bandaged. I sat up and wiped my face, I shakily stood up to look around and there he was. Laying on the couch, going through his tablet where hed schedule meetings and such. It wasnt a dream
Maybe we can start over.
YOU ARE READING
Eddsworld Oneshots
Fanfiction♡ I will do Tomatt, Tomtord, Eddmatt, Tordedd, Tomedd, Tordmatt. I will not do any fics eith the neighbors or side characters! sorry!! Using this to sharpen up my writing skills For you horny mofos I do have a smut oneshot, I will only be doing fluf...
