𝑅𝑒𝒾𝑔𝓃 𝒶𝓃𝒹 𝒟𝒶𝓁𝓁𝒶𝓈

v- rants.

reign

school that day went by slow as ever.

it's been about two weeks and me and dally still haven't made up or even talked. when he's at my house i simply leave the house or go in my room.

it seems like the little things set me off all the time. i stoped talking my meds. i am bipolar and dally was a big help with that but now that he's gone it's taking a toll on everything. i feel like i'm just going to snap and set off.

i was walking back to my house after getting high at the shed when i look in the drive way to see darry's truck.

shit. i thought to myself. normally i could act sober but today i was too high to do so.

i walked in the door with my head hung low. i heard loud chatter indicating that the whole gang was here.

"where were you?" darry's voice said snapping me out of my thoughts.

"i was on a walk" i mumble quietly still looking down so they couldn't see my tired and slightly red eyes.

i hear him get up off his chair and walk in front of me.

"reign." he said looking down on me.

i don't respond i just stay there trying to conceal my laughter. for some reason this whole things was really funny to my intoxicated self.

"reign" he says again. the whole gang was silently staring at me waiting for me to do something.

darry then grabbed my chin forcing me to look up at him. our eyes met and a sense of realization flashed in his eyes that quickly turned into anger.

"reign tell me right now where you were and what you were doing." his booming voice demanded.

that's it. i couldn't handle it i burst out laughing. i was laughing so hard i couldn't breath and my knees gave out. i found my self on my knees and laughing.

but then i started crying. sobbing actually. it all happened in a second i wasn't even in the mood to cry. but i needed to let it out.

i cried for dally. i cried for my parents. i cried for myself. i just cried.

the whole gang looked at me as if i was crazy. suddenly dallas shot up from his spot on the couch and headed into the kitchen.

i put two and two together and figured out that he was looking for my meds to see if i have taken them.

i sluggishly pulled myself up from the ground and hurriedly tried to make my way out of the front door to leave but before i could even reach the door i felt hands on my waist pulling me back around.

ignoring the feelings i got when he touched me like that i just stared at him.

he stood there with my medication in his hands and an angry scowl held on his face.

"what is this?" he said referring to the medicine and how it was full indicating i haven't taken any.

"don't worry about it." i yelled ripping his hands off me.

"well i am so now tell me why you stopped taking them." he demanded.

"it's none of your goddamn business." i said back walking off to my room shoulder checking him on the way out.

once i reached my room i just sat there on my bed shakily breathing. i lay there staring and thinking about how that was the first time we interacted in weeks. how i felt when his calloused hands grazed my waist.

my thoughts were interrupted when there was a knock on my door.

"go away" i said to whoever was on the other side of my door. they didn't listen and walked in instead. i was about to yell at them until i realized it was johnny. i couldn't yell at him.

"hey j." i said using my nickname for him.

"reign what was that all about. please tell me i'll listen." he pleaded laying down next to me and giving me those damn puppy eyes i couldn't say no too.

" i don't even know. after everything happened with dallas and i it felt as if nothing really matters. i started getting high more and taking my meds less." is said. johnny knew i smoked he does it with me sometimes.

"it's like there's a whole and i need something to fill it. but there's nothing so i just tried to forget." i said getting up off my bed and pacing around the room.

"i try to just push everything away and keep my feelings to myself but he let me show them. he just listend and he helped me with everything."
i said walking out of my room and back down to the kitchen with him trailing behind me.

i walked around aimlessly just thinking. forgetting everyone could hear me and johnny.

"i just want my best friend back." i tell him truthfully as tears well up in my eyes again.

"i'm tired of feeling like i'm fucking crazy." i said ending my rant. silent tears stroll down my face as i stare at johnny.

he walks over wrapping his arms around me. i cry into his shoulder as my body shakes.

he walks me upstairs and lays me down in my bed.

"i'll be back try to get some rest." he says soothing me.

i fight the urge to sleep but it soon wins. i lay there untill i fall asleep fully.

mb i was on vacation and school started so i couldn't update.