Love Stories ~ shorts :)

Antidote

I blinked, the rain mixing with the tears. "Then there's nothing left to say, is there?"
I didn't wait for a response. Turning on my heel, I walk, and I walk away until I i can no longer hear his ragged breathing. The sand of the beach morphs under my feet, gets stuck in the crevices of each toe. Each step is soundless; everything soundless.
"You're right."
I stopped dead in my tracks. He was still standing still, curls pasted to his head. Then, he approached. "There's nothing left to say."
My heart quickened. "Then walk away."
"You know I can't," he says, stopping in front of me. His eyes were trained on mine. "Because there's one more thing left to do."
I knew what was happening before it happened. His hands came to my cheeks and lips to mine, pressing hard with desperation and desire. With love.
No. He doesn't love you.
But he persists. There is something in the way he holds me now, not in a sense that seems mechanic and impatient, but gentle. His hands move to my neck, my shoulders, and then my waist, and I gasped at the feeling.
He pulls away, panting. "I love you, and I don't know why I've been denying it," he rasps.
No.
"No," I repeat out loud. "No you don't."
His face melts into an expression of confusion. "What do you-"
"You don't love me," I said in pain. "You loved the idea of me, you loved being noticed by everyone when you're with me. You love how I look, how I am. But you don't love me."
He stops. Perhaps there was a world where everything was perfect, where I looked at him and never saw the pain, the torture he put me through. A world where I could clearly see his true beauty. It was a beauty he had exposed himself for me to see, imperfect and pure. But every sensible part of me wasn't willing to accept he was real; human.
So with that in my head, I step away even more. His feet are planted in the sand.
"You used me," I come to speak. "You showed me off, manipulated my thoughts and feelings. Do you know what that does to someone?"
"Anne-"
"You don't know," I say. "And you never will. That's the beauty of it all, Jake. Life is a cruise for you. It's luxurious, elegant, and everything is handed to you on a silver platter."
"What about you?"
I scoffed with a renewed stir of anger. "Me? My life is a little canoe in a storm. I have worked my ass off to get where I am. There were no silver plates, no feasts or mansions. I had to earn what I got."
He sighs, then mutters something. There's a change in his face, and it's concerning: he looks insane, his eyes wide, mouth slightly agape.
He mumbled something I can't comprehend, so I ask. "What did you say?"
"I am so sorry," he gasps, pacing the beach, running a hand through his hair. "I'm sorry."
"It's too late-"
"I'm not asking you to forgive me," he cuts in, startling me. "I'm not begging for you to come back. But I see it. I see how I've treated you. I see how you looked at me, confused, scared. Oh my god, I am so sorry."
He doesn't stop there, but his anxious pacing resides. "Love will never be easy for me. This will never be an excuse, but I saw how my dad treated my mum. That's what I grew up with. A sick idea of love."
The air was salty as I inhaled. He never talked about his parents. "What happened to them?"
"They split up. But it wasn't clean," he answered. "Long nights listening to screaming, crying, smashing plates..."
I blink, and let tears stream down my face "Wow," was all I could say.
He looked at me. "Wow?"
"That's... tough," I slowly reply.
"But I didn't want you to see me that way," he proceeds. "A broken guy with a mask so thick, no one can see through him."
"But instead, I saw you as a monster," I mumble.
"But it's not an excuse," he repeats himself. "And I don't expect you to see me any differently."
I look at him now, and feel... nothing. There is no pain behind my eyes, there is no feeling of betrayal. Just exactly what he had feared: a broken boy. He's vulnerable, scared, nothing I was ever used to seeing.
"I'm going to go now," he starts. "But I want you to know. I never meant to hurt you."
I can't bring myself to follow him. I can't find the courage to speak, to talk to him. I only find peace in seeing his tall and slim figure grace the beach, walking away with a newfound purity. The waves retreat to the depths of its secretive waters, and I wipe a random tear from my eyes. So this is how it ends. No rings, no promises, no fantasies I was so caught up believing in. Just two teens an a poisoned love.
But I've grown. From the minute I said yes, all the way to this moment, I have become stronger, more wise. I can't see Jake now, but I know I won't be looking for him anymore.
It felt like hours, watching the sun duck behind the ocean, the stars begin to dot the sky. When I finally have feeling in my feet, I have healed just a little bit more.
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Hey guys!
I know there might not be a lot of context, so please let me know if you need a little synopsis :))))