The Rampage MC #3: Atlas and Joy

Chapter 3 (Joy): Just Go

"But to cry in front of you, that's the worst thing I could do." ~The Worst Thing I Could Do, Grease

Two weeks after Kit and I decided to give ourselves two more months, Brandie had returned, Trixie spreading it around that her sister hadn't been challenged by the job she'd been hired for.

Translation: Brandie had been fired.

"She could become a club girl," Trixie had said within my hearing, "but no way would Atlas let that happen. He's been calling her all the time since she came back, and I think he wants to claim her as his Ol' Lady eventually."

Don't react.

One morning, Kit had been alone in the kitchen with me and had smacked my ass -- and too late he'd realized Trixie had been standing in the doorway. 

"Bitch better keep her mouth shut," Kit grumbled to me after she walked away with a smirk. 

Ever since then, Trixie had it out for me and was pushing Brandie at Kit hard. There were nasty asides,  sly looks and derogatory comments aimed at me but not said to me.

You think, I'm OK with my body. It's not perfect, it has this, that and the other thing wrong with it, but I've worked hard on coming to love myself as I am. If I lose thirty pounds, I'll love myself the same as I do now. If I gain thirty pounds, I'll love myself the same as I do now. But then a snide comment, a smirk while judgmental eyes raked over your body...and all the hard work you'd done is out the window and you were wishing if only I had a better body.

But Kit continued to maintain his adoration of my curves. The way he looked at me, the way his hands  worshipped my body, the way he pulled me on top of him and told me to ride him hard so he could watch me -- that didn't speak to a man repulsed by me. 

But one day after Brandie came back, I was just entering the common room and Brandie had just crossed it, when I heard the brothers talk about her banging body.

"Absolute perfection," Kit had agreed. 

I'd immediately backed away into the kitchen so Kit would never know I overheard him, and forced myself not to cry. Maybe he'd been agreeing simply to throw them off the trail of us. It would look pretty weird if Kit hadn't gone along with it.

Still, I'd been of two minds that night when I expected him in my room. Not answer or let him in and...

"Is your light out, baby? Why is it dark in here, Joy?"

"I don't want the lights on tonight, Kit. Just come on to bed."

"But I want to see you, Joy. You know how I like to see you -- need to see you."

"Not tonight, Kit."

"What's going on? I've been looking forward to seeing you all day." As much as you looked forward to seeing Brandie's absolute perfection?

"If you don't like it, you can leave." I'd never spoken to him like that before. Kit always teased me that he'd never met someone more perfectly named. You're always so happy, Joy. You're pure sunshine. Now, he was seeing a less-sunny Joy. "You know your way to the door."

That had stopped him cold. "Don't say that, baby."

I'd stood firm and had never, after that night, allowed him to turn on the lights. Kit grumbled and growled and argued, saying he hated not being able to see me, but who knew if that was even true? Maybe he was secretly relieved. The blackout curtains I'd hung in my room helped to make it even darker.

He tried once to turn on my nightstand table lamp, but I'd told him if he did, I'd change the code on my door. That was a serious statement, warning him that I'd lock him out of my room.