Prologue

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My heels clacked against the cement walkway which lead up to the Academy. The place where I grew and flourished in my teens. It stood prim and proper. Lively, and happy. Perfect in it's brick and stone glory.

Headmistress Orihime, who was once my headmistress, and is now my boss, stood at the door to greet me. Her lovely face was plastered with joy as our eyes met.

"Hoshimiya-san! Long time no see!" she exclaimed as she gently pulled me into one of those 'professional hugs', where you stand a foot away from a person and pat their shoulder.

"It's so nice to see you! You look good as always," I replied.

"Thank you. And you're all grown up!"

My lips curved into a flustered grin. "Yeah,"

"Come on inside, you're going to need to tell me all about your studying in america!" Orihime waved her hand for me to follow.

I followed her through the school halls that felt so familiar. My heart warmed with nostalgia.


♡♡♡

I caught a glimpse of Suzukawa-Sensei with Johnny-Sensei in a classroom as I followed my headmistress.

For a flicker of a second, my eyes were met with the former's piercing golden glare. Then I blinked away, snapping my attention back to reconnecting delightfully with Orihime.


The morning of my orientation day had passed in a blur, and I sat at the cafeteria with my lunch on the side, and my laptop in front of me. I was so strenuously typing away with my syllabus that I barely noticed the figure in front of me, until I heard the muffled sound of a deep male voice penetrate the lofi beat in my headphones. I looked up to see who it was.

Suzukawa-sensei.

It's been years since I had seen him. Years ago when I studied here, he was the school's groundskeeper and had become a teacher here when I was in highschool. He carried mystery with him at every step, with his unkempt black hair, pale white skin, and golden eyes. He was quite attractive by conventional standards, and all my classmates gushed over him. I didn't get it. He had been a huge help in some of my times of need, and vice versa. But it was still weird to overhear girls fawning at his every word. It's a bit weird now to look him in the eyes and be...the same age, as equals.

Nevermind that, it's good to see him.

I flashed him my brightest smile, beaming. "Suzukawa-sensei! Really good to see you, it's been a while!" I kicked a chair which idly sat diagonally from my spot at a four-person table, waving for him to sit down.

He sat down, the crisp linen fabric of his pristine dress shirt crinkled as he leaned over.

"You looked rather serious at your computer. I was just checking on you to make sure it's still you," he laughed.

Umm, what?

"You know, since the Hoshimiya I know was bouncing all over the place," he continued.

Is he...patronising me? I may be bubbly, but I'm not a doormat. Whatever, kill him with kindness, Ichigo. "Well, if I was bouncing all over the place while also using my laptop, I'd end up breaking it." I forced myself to laugh.

"Yeah. It's okay if you're a little bit clumsy. It's very you." His eyes lowered on me with a wide grin.

"W-what do you mean by that?" I asked. I knew exactly what he was doing. I just want him to own up to it.

He chuckled. "I'm just saying that it's okay if you're clumsy. Since you said you'd drop your laptop if you're not careful."

That's not what I said. I cleared my throat, sternness in my tone of voice as I said, "Suzukawa-sensei..."

He raised his brows. "Yes?"

You're being rude.

Those words sat on my tongue, yet my every nerve froze upon attempting to stutter it out.  

Be kind, Ichigo.  That's what Mama has always taught you.

"Anyways," he continued.  "I hope you're not planning on teaching irresponsibly."

I blinked.  "Huh?"

"I mean," he trailed for a second before his face stiffened.  "I hope you're planning to actually teach and not just preach any airy fairy malarky that won't actually teach."

Yes, Suzukawa-san.  Because you were a top idol for ten years and ongoing.

The audacity.

"I'll teach my students idolhood how my way, and you can teach yours your way."  I feel bad for his students already.

"What I mean, Hoshimiya, is that you have to teach them hard work and discipline.  Not just 'you're going to be the best if you wear a pink and pretty skirt', or 'keep smiling and you'll get do well'.  Teach them."

Because I didn't have hard work and discipline?  You think I got to where I am by wearing pretty skirts and smiling?  

Ignore him, papa would say to me if he were still alive.  Keep smiling and you'll do---

It was as though Suzukawa had guessed my father's very words before he disappeared two years ago and twisted them with disdain.  

I closed my laptop as I stood up, tucking it back into my book bag and grabbing my lunch.  He parted his lips to speak, but before he uttered a word, I forced my face into a bright smile and cut him off with,

"Have a good day, Suzukawa-sensei."

Then I stormed away from the table at a hurried pace.  Every time he would say, "are you stupid?", or something along those lines every time I said something that wasn't up to par with his oh so great "intelligence" back when I was a student here, flashed through my mind in a flicker of bitter memories, reeling like a vintage movie.

Yeah, I'll be definitely avoiding him.  Especially after he mocked me, unknowingly mocked my father.

Father.

Tears welled in my eyes.   It's been two years.  Two years since I neglected to give him a goodbye, a final goodbye, amidst a not-so-important meeting about the movie I was yet to star in. Two years since we laughed and he promised we'd make Christmas cookies together when I was back from tour in Korea and he was back from the jungles of Namibia over the phone.

He never returned.  His plane crashed that very night.

Wiping my tears, I plastered a smile on my face so no students would see my cry.  

Smile.  It's what my father would want if he were still here.

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