Six Secrets - Noa Olivar

11

The days went by fast leading up to Friday. Every morning Jules has track training with Noa and soon Noa's ankle monitor would be coming off, which was very exciting. School was boring yet not at the same time. The deceiving looks in the hallways as the girls had all been framed as murderers didn't make any of them feel good. Just to make sure they wouldn't be jumped in the halls, each girl would make sure that they would meet up with another while walking to their classes. Power in numbers you know? Jules found herself either at the Orpheum or at pinball pizza every day after school. Working made her very tired but she had to do what she needed to do. She'd always thought about how different her life would have been had she not been born into the family she was. Sure she may not have had Charlie or even Noa, which makes her stomach turn thinking about it, but at the same time, maybe she'd be in a supporting happy family. A family with parents who believe in her and protect her, rather than tearing her down piece by piece until she's nothing but a pile of ashes. She kept thinking about her dad, how her dad could be out soon, and if he does manage to get out, if he plans to come for her and her mother. She wanted to help her mother become better, so they could both fight him off, she hasn't really succeeded. What Jules should be worrying about though is the parent conference the girls would all have tomorrow. Jules had no idea how she was supposed to get her mother out of the house and she didn't want to try on Noa and her mother Marjorie to help her.

She sat with her mother in the living room watching tv as they ate their Chinese food, something they never did together. Jules could tell she was throwing her mother off, as she'd like to see her mother staring at her from time to time, but this is exactly what she wanted. "Did you want something, kid?" "Can't I just sit with my mother? Is that so wrong?" "What did I do to deserve that?" "You don't have to do anything. This is something I wanted to do." Jules said. Chris looked over at her daughter,  she didn't know what to think. "Julianna,  why are you here? Why haven't you just left and gone to live with Noa. Why have you stayed for a crappy mother like me?" "Because you're all I have. And even though everything's gone to shoot since her, I don't want to lose everyone." "I don't want to lose everyone too. I've cost you almost everyone in your life. But I don't regret losing your father. Even though I've been a shitty mother, I will never be as bad as that man. And the fact that he may be out soon, I don't know what we'll do." "So you did know he was getting out?" "You don't think I tried to stop it?" Jules looked over at her mother, furrowing her brows. She tried to stop her dad from getting out? She tried to stop her husband from getting out?" "What do you mean mom? How did you try to stop that?" "The day I stole your check, I tried bribing a man I know works in the prison where your dad is but he couldn't do anything. That's why I was so adamant about having your check." Jules felt a lump in her throat. All this time she thought her mother lost her control and technically she did but she was doing it, to protect her? Can she even believe her? She didn't know. "Mom, I need you to come to the school tomorrow." "What why?" "I kind of got in a problem and they're considering expelling me." "What?! Julianna Vaughn, you will tell me right now why you may be expelled!!" "It wasn't our fault. A girl died at our school and the other people at our school believed that me and my friends were responsible for it because we kind of screened a video of her at the cinema embarrassing her. It's just because she was bullying all of us horrendously. We felt scared to go to school with her, we just wanted to get her back. Now everybody thinks she took her life because of us but it wasn't our fault." "How is that not your fault?" "You're telling me you never did anything horrible in high school mom?! We did make that video but we did not kill Karen!" Chris grew silent when she heard her daughter mention high school. Chris wanted to forget a lot of what has happened in her life and besides what happened to her daughter, high school was number one. She couldn't think about her teenage years, all the awful things she went through and all the things she did. "This ain't about me child! This is about you. You fucked up, majorly. And now I have to go fix everything." "I'm not the only girl who's in trouble." "Is Noa in trouble? I know she can't afford to be in more trouble with the police." "Noa is in trouble. But we are innocent. At least, I think we are." Chris stood up as she approached her daughter. Jules felt the need to flinch and back away from her mother but she didn't move a muscle. She stood still and watched her get closer. Just as she thought about yelling, her mother put her hands on her shoulders. "Take it from me baby, no one in this world is innocent. We all have our regrets. And we all have our secrets. Some things can't be taken back but also will never be spoken about again. So I'm not going to get angry with you. I'll just play the disappointment card, even though I know damn well you can play that card with me. And even though I don't give a fuck about your school, I guess I'll go and straighten this out." As she took her hands off Jules shoulders she stumbled slightly, causing Jules to grab her and bring her to her room. Jules can't remember the last time her mother has actually slept in her bedroom, usually passing out in front of the couch, as she sat her mom down on her bed. She went into the bathroom and filled a cup with water before she handed it to her mother. "I know you're not shit faced but you have to be sober tomorrow. At least sober enough that they won't be able to say anything." Chris stared up at her daughter before she took the glass and began to drink it back. When she finished, Jules pulled the covers down as her mom went under, and she pulled the covers up before turning off the light and closing the door. Sometimes Jules felt like an adult. Sorry, not sometimes, all the time. She does admit that her mother had her and Charlie decently young but sometimes she feels like she's talking to a friend rather than a parent. As much as she enjoyed the freedom and the maturity she had been gifted, she just wished once in a while she had a shoulder to lean on, not always having to be the support dog. A girl can dream though, right?