Late nights are the worst without you by my side (tsukishimaxreader)

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He stared at the dark ceiling, eyes getting dry from being open for so long. He laid on his back, fidgeting with his hands like he had been for the past 5 hours. Tsukishima was unable to fall asleep. Correction, tsukishima was unable to fall asleep 𝘢𝘭𝘰𝘯𝘦.

The apartment was unbearably empty without you here. He hadn't slept without you next to him in over a year and he hated it. But what kind of asshole would he have been if he told you that you couldn't go to your friends house for the night because of his own selfishness?

He had already talked to Yamaguchi for a while, but the other boy went to bed at 10pm like a fucking phycopath. So here he was, 3am, tired as fuck and missing you in a way he couldn't quite voice. However pathetic it might sound, he 𝘯𝘦𝘦𝘥𝘦𝘥 you here.

His hands were getting cold and from being awake in the pitch black for so long, he was beginning to become a bit paranoid. He sat up in the bed, turning the lamp beside your bed on. Slowly, he stood up. If he couldn't fall asleep he'd have a cup of tea. He crept out of your shared room and down the hall into the kitchen, turning the lights on as he went.

He sighed to himself as he turned the kettle on. This would be something he would have to deal with on his own. It wasn't something he should burden you with, he wanted you to have fun. He grabbed a bag of chamomile tea, placing it in his favorite mug. Maybe it would help him sleep.

He poured the hot water into the mug and sat at the island. His eyes felt heavy. He wanted to sleep but he wanted you more. The apartment was eerie without you. It seemed more sad, almost as if the building itself missed your bubbly presence. He knew that if you were here right now you'd be cooing at him and kissing him and playing with his hair so he could fall asleep and-

He took a long drink of his tea. If you were here it would be easier, he wouldn't be longing for you the way that he was. It was stupid. He 𝘬𝘯𝘦𝘸 it was stupid. He had no problems when you were gone all day or when you were both so busy you hardly got to talk because at the end of the day he'd still have you next to him whilst he slept, and he'd still have you next to him when he woke up, and that's what mattered most.

He wanted you here with him so he could fall asleep. He truly wanted nothing more in the world right now. He looked at the clock on the stove to check the time, but his glasses were still on his nightstand, so he couldn't actually tell. He pulled his phone out of his pocket. 3:47am. You'd be home in a few hours, around 7am since your friend had to work in the morning. Just a little more then three hours. He could do that.

He felt his stomach grumble. You had left that afternoon, and he hadn't eaten since. You would've made sure he had something - anything at all. But then again, you shouldn't be responsible for him eating dinner. But you took it soon yourself, and he loved you for it.

He took another slow sip of his tea.
Love? He hadn't expressed love yet, despite being in a relationship with you for over three years. You'd expressed it though - many, many times. Every day. But not an ounce of pressure was on him to say it back. You'd wait for him to be ready.

He ran his hand through his blonde hair, sighing once again. You were so patient with him. He didn't deserve you. He checked the time again. 4:29am. 2 and a half hours. He'd forgotten about his tea, it was cold now. So were his feet and his hands. He microwaved the tea, not bothering to do anything else before sitting back down.

You were so kind and patient that he'd been bullied by his teammates in highschool because of it. They were refered to as 'Sweet 'n sour' for an entire year. Everyone constantly pointing out how undeserving of your love he was. His fist clench around the handle of the mug. He was better than those idiots anyways. Afterall, you'd have to have seen something in him for you to stay with him for three years, right?

His fingers traced along his forearm, landing on the string bracelet you had made him over a year ago. He'd never taken it off. It was light green, yellow and dark green simply braided together but he didn't care. It was from you. That was all that mattered.

Another swig of his tea.
It was fucking ridiculous. The fact that he couldn't function at night without you. The fact that he couldn't fall asleep without you next to him. The fact that he'd been sitting at your kitchen table for - he checked the time - well over two hours waiting for you to come home like a lost fucking puppy.

His stomach began to really ache, and truly he didn't want to move from his spot until you came home, but his thoughts flooded with how unhappy you would be if you'd figured out he hadn't fed himself while you were gone. How much more hesitate you'd be to go out anywhere.

He stretched as he got up. His legs were aching from being in the same position for so long. His body was cracking and every one of his limbs were stupidly sore. He opened the fridge, peering down to see if there were any leftovers to heat up. Ah ha. He knew it. Left over soba. He didn't care enough to heat it up. He looked between the forks and the chopsticks, grabbed a fork and sat back down.

He was far too uncoordinated to use chopsticks, agressivly stabbing his food will do just fine. Reluctantly, he shoved some of the noodles into his mouth, only really thinking about how much you'd appreciate it. Eventually, he'd finished most of his cold noodles, pushing the rest of them to the side. He rested his elbows on the island, letting his head fall into his hands. He was so fucking tired. He just needed you back.

His eyelids felt extremely heavy. 𝘏𝘦 felt extremely heavy. Like he was being physically weighed down by the overtiredness. Like his body was losing all its muscle, unable to hold itself up any longer. He felt unbelievably weak. His arms began to shake at the weight of his head. Slowly, he just gave up. Resting his forehead against the island, hands over the back of his head.

And he heard the door open. His head tilted towards it, eyes just open enough to see you.
"Kei I'm home! Are you up y- Kei?!" You dropped all of the things you were holding, running over to him.
"Are you okay baby? Kei? Kei can you hear me?" You whispered, he lifted his head slowly and you immidiatly pressed your hand to his forehead. He'd never seen you look so worried.

"I'm okay, I'm okay.. I missed you." His voice was grumbly, and he reached out for you.
"Oh my god you didn't sleep did you? Hun you look so tired. Let's go to our room okay? We'll get you to bed." You let him lean on you as he nodded, standing up. You took in the empty tea mug and the nearly empty tupperware dish on the counter. He'd been there for a while.

You carefully walked to the room, pulling the blanket aside so he had a clear spot to lay down. With no further instructions, he laid down. As you went to tuck him in, he grabbed your wrist.
"I missed you." He whispered, though he said it earlier, it ment something different now. Hid tired eyes meet yours. Your eyes widened.

"Oh, Kei!" You practically jumped ontop of him, hugging him and curling up to his side.
"Did you not sleep because you were lonely? My poor boy - did you stay up all night waiting for me to get home?" you asked, grabbing the blankets and pulling them on-top of you two. He didn't answer. You waited.
"Kei, I will always be free if you need me." It was simple, and he understood.

He gave a small nod as his eyes closed, you drew shapes on his chest with your finger and whispered sweet nothings to him to help him fall asleep. Finally, he felt whole again. You were the last piece to his puzzle. His final though as he was falling asleep next to you, sunrise beautiful as ever, was that he, Tsukishima Kei, was 𝘥𝘦𝘧𝘪𝘯𝘪𝘵𝘦𝘭𝘺 going to marry you.