Diary ng Mataba [COMPLETED]

INTRO

"Why don't you just, like, stop eating?"

It took me a second to realize the skinny, pretty girl sitting on the opposite side of the lunch table was talking to me. I looked up from my untouched tray of school slop, blinked, and said, "Huh?"

She smiled and tilted her head to the side, her long, sleek black hair trailing the motion. "Just stop eating." Her tone was sweet as honey, and as I looked into her acorn-colored eyes, I realized she wasn't joking-no, she was serious! She waggled her cherry Blow Pop between her slender, manicured fingers, as though scolding me, before continuing, "It's what I did when I got fat."

I was 14 and I was so shocked, upset, and embarrassed that I only nodded and went back to conversing with the girl next to me. I did my hardest to ignore my stomach's pleading growls. Little did she know that I was actually already taking her advice: I hadn't eaten for nearly four days. After her comment, I didn't eat for two more.

Then, my hunger won. It always did. Each time I starved myself, I ended up binging on food to fill the void low self-esteem left. And each time, I'd look in the mirror and hate myself; not just for the way my body jiggled like Jell-O, but for entrapping
myself in this vicious cycle of unhealthiness.

It felt like I was holding myself prisoner. Why didn't I stop myself from repeating my mistakes? I knew that what I was doing was bad for my health and completely useless.

------