We're Just Friends

Chapter One

Whoever told you being in love was easy has never actually been in love. Love is tumultuous, love is painful, and most of all, love really sucks.

Love is not saying what you really feel out of fear of being rejected. Love is having your parents abandon you but still not being able to hate them. Love is watching your best friend swipe first place right out from under you and not launching yourself at them to commit murder.

"That's it," I state definitively, gently setting the controller on the coffee table. "I'm done being friends with all of you, specifically you, Alex. I hate you." I turn and look at Alex directly as I say that, hoping my expression is coming off teasing. He sticks his tongue out at me and can't seem to stop the smile seeping onto his face, so I know I communicated my joke properly.

"Cal, you say that every time. I think you need to admit," Alice trails off a bit and I know without a doubt what she's going to say next. Everyone else does too, and Brandon starts to dissolve into snickers before either Alice or I speak again.

"Piss off Alice, I don't want to hear whatever bullshit you're about to spout."

"Oh come on guys," Alex chooses now to lean forward and join in. He looks at me reassuringly and I sag in relief for a moment, thinking he's finally coming to my rescue. "It's not Cal's fault he's such a sore loser," he grins evilly at me now, and I picture the shade of colour his face will turn with my hands around his neck.

Instead, I say, "Easy for you, Mr. First-Place-Every-Time. I don't think you've ever not been in first place." He smiles softly at me, and I feel my heart melt and my ears start to turn red. I look away quickly. "Let's play something else, something I'm actually good at. I need some redemption after that circus."

"That is a wonderful idea, my dear Cal,"

"Where are you going with this, you little rascal?"

"But some of us actually have homework." Brandon finishes Alice's sentence. "Not all of us are wicked quick during class." I think I hear Alice mutter 'nerd' under her breath but when I look over she seems thoroughly engrossed in her agenda.

"Actually, speaking of," Brandon pipes up, "Our short story portfolio for Erickson is due next Monday." He looks up at me, trying to gauge what I'll say before I say it.

"Okay despite what you all think," Alex shoves my shoulder and I fix my statement. "What the two of you think, I'm not that good at doing my homework on time. I still need to write a few more pieces for the portfolio." I glance up at Alex, who's moved along the top of the couch to be sitting right behind me now, and he's leaned down a bit to listen to me. I wait for him to answer my silent question.

"I've got some Biology work to finish, you can do your portfolio here if you want. You can use my computer too if you need." I smile brightly at him and he returns it easily.

"I have mine, but thanks." We turn back to Alice and Brandon who quickly look away from each other and back to us. "You guys are welcome to stay if you want?" It's not technically my place to invite Alice and Brandon to stay longer, since we are at Alex's house, but I do anyway, because I know Alex would have done the same. It feels like at this point Alex and I are practically interchangeable, at least our possessions are. For example, Alex is wearing my hoodie that has my name on it, that I got in our first year of high school, but since he's had it for so long now it's basically his hoodie.

"I can't stay," Brandon looked apologetic. "Since none of you heathens take Math and I didn't bring my textbook."

"I don't want to third wheel you two alone, so bye." Alice was painfully brutal as always. Not that Alex and I are dating. We just bicker like an old married couple, and everyone who doesn't hang out with us thinks we've been together since always. But we're not dating. Nope. Not at all. Not even in our wildest dreams. Dating Alex? Gross. That's unthinkable. I totally haven't thought about it once ever in my entire friendship with Alex. Dating him, that'd be strange, totally, because we're definitely not comfortable with each other, and spend all our time together, and touch each other casually. Nope, dating Alex would definitely be weird.