Memorabilia

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For years I had such an attachment to running and honestly, I still do. I can't commit to any other sports because I always think that it'll get in the way of my running and prevent it from being my number one priority for another five years. The gratifying feeling I get after every race, the rush, the pit in my stomach at the starting line that is formed from nervousness or excitement — I can't tell. You can't experience that in any other sport. The same thing goes for the slight decline in your mental health after a bad race, or the unravelling of your self worth because you base it off of every race; even the ones you run with an injury. You can experience all of that in a person too. I experienced it with you. I feel like everything I did for running were things I had to do for you too. I spent hours upon hours of my days on you, I dedicated my life and soul to you even if that meant not being able to do the same for others, I grew mentally and physically for you. I think the real mistake I made, contrary to what you believe, was devoting myself to something other than running.