Little girl lost: The day I lost myself

Little girl lost: the day I lost all hope

I will always remember the day I found someone that made the mistake of getting engaged to. The young man was 13 yrs younger than me and as time went on I would also find out that he was also controlling and emotionally abusive towards me.  It was because of how he treated me that caused me to lose all my self esteem and self worth. Since then I don't have the self esteem to believe that I am worth any other man's time or that any man would treat me any better. At that time I also had an American Eskimo dog that I had also adopted on my own his name was Blake. The very first night he was with me the young man had purposely let him out of the old apartment building I was living in at that time. I got Blake back but looking back on it I wish I had the young man pay the money to get him back. I was sitting in church he said that he was probably dead my friend Erica Rocheleau looked at him and told him " shut up Andrusha, your not helping." The day I put Blake down was the hardest thing I had to do.  Then it was 4 months after Blake left I had found my now 6 yr old pure bred beagle named daisy and she has been my saving grace and I love her. I still have not found someone to love me for me and I doubt I ever will.