Crescent (Old Version)

+ Part 55 +

The library was colder than it was most nights. I had bundled up in a thick knit sweater and still wrapped a cozy blanket around my back as I tried to read. But too often, my hands would dig into the pocket of my evening dress and I'd feel the cold heavy metal of my mother's broach in my hand.

I thought that carrying it would bring some kind of comfort. I carried it with me for most of the day, occasionally reaching into the pocket of my dress and feeling the extricate edges dig into my palm. But my pockets might as well have been filled with lead for how heavy it felt.

If anything, it only made me think of my family more. It made me remember the moment when my mother had promised she would give it to me someday when I was older. It made me wonder how the hell Ceth had gotten it.

And it was thoughts like that that had finally convinced me to shove it into the drawer of my desk for the rest of the evening. I couldn't think about how Ceth had found out about it or how he could have saved it from the fire. When I found my thoughts wandering to it, I quickly filled my mind with other things. Books, distractions, copious amounts of caffeine.

Janice's teas did wonders to help me stay awake most nights, studying at the desk nearest to the fire. I had a book propped open in my lap, stock papers for the gala on the desk, and a steaming mug of shell-pink tea in my hand that did little to deter the cold.

I felt the cold air stir as the library doors swung open. The hair on the back of my neck stood on end as they swung back closed, admitting the only distraction I couldn't allow.

I felt him behind me without even having to look up. His presence made my entire body go hot, made warmth creep up my neck, my face. But, I didn't mind the warmth. Part of me craved it.

But, he could never know that. No one could ever know that.

"You shouldn't be here," I said aloud without turning toward him. I hoped the ice in my voice was enough for him not to come any closer, but somehow, I already knew it wouldn't deter him.

Behind me, he leaned against one of the bookshelves, and his eyes remained trained on me. "I thought we already agreed that we both don't belong here."

I swallowed the lump in my throat before gathering the courage to look over my shoulder at him. "Don't do that, Gabriel. You know what I'm talking about." I leveled him a look. "Do you think he won't find out about this sooner or later?" I motioned to the space between us, anxiously folding my hands into fists when I saw the smile forming on his lips.

He raised a dark brow, teasing. "This?"

I huffed, shutting my book and turning back to the work in front of me. I was still arranging how to get Janice the bulk of the ingredients she needed for the gala and it was proving to be a challenge considering I didn't know how to contact the majority of the buyers. But there was no way in hell I was going to be able to concentrate now. Not when I'd already been avoiding this conversation since the first day the envoys had arrived.

"I am a lady," a bitter taste filled my mouth. "You are an ambassador." The words hung in the air, and I dreaded that I might actually have to say the words.

Leave. He definitely needed to leave.

His voice was a challenge. "Say it, Brenna."

The quill in my hand snapped, ink splattered the cuff of my sweater I wore. I cursed under my breath, my face flushed again as I stood and made to find another stuffed into one of the drawers in this damn room. "You're impossible."

"You say the word, and I'll go," his voice was gruff, and I forced myself to pay attention as I rummaged through the drawers in my desk. There were spare wax candles, metal stamps, and thick stationary in most of the drawers. In others, there were books with empty pages, waiting to be written in- the broach for gods sake- but for some god damn reason, I couldn't find a quill. I felt Gabriel appear behind me, and without looking him in the eyes, I stared at the swan feather quill in his fingers. He held it out to me, a peace offering maybe.