Whumptober 2022: VALORANT

Day 12: The Living Nightmare

Prompt: Nightmares

Focus Agent: Fade
Featured Agents: Cypher

Timeline: Fade is the most recently joined agent at number 20

Summary: Fade knows fear well. Even she cannot escape her nightmares.

The Living Nightmare

  "I've seen your darkest fears. Mine would eat them alive."

Fade was not immune to fear, to nightmares. Even after making a deal with the Nightmare and given the ability to know and manipulate the fear of others, she could not control her own.

As a child, her nights were plagued with nightmares and her mother would come and sing her Turkish lullabies. Well, she wasn't a child anymore.

There were some perks to joining the VALORANT Protocol, the newest agent realized. There was an immense, though not endless, supply of coffee in the break room, which Fade frequently indulged in. It was not the same quality as the coffee back home, but it sufficed. She made strong brews and hennaed her hands in the empty kitchen under lamp light. Occasionally, one of the younger agents snuck in for a midnight snack, but otherwise the base was quiet and peaceful at night.

She had hardly signed on to being Agent 20 of the VALORANT Protocol when Brimstone was already sending Fade on missions. She rather deserved it. She had caused them quite a scare, she was proud to say, and it will take some time and hard work for her to earn their trust. She preferred it this way.

So when Brimstone called her into his office late one night, she marched in, sat casually in the chair opposite of his desk, and inquired, "Another mission? Good. Anything to keep me awake."

Fade missed very little and noticed the slight furrow of the commander's eyebrows. It was gone as quickly as it came.

"You're aware of Project Omega?"

At this, Fade leaned forward, interest piqued, and nodded.

"Killjoy says the portal is ready for its first test run. I want you to infiltrate Omega and bring back intel."

"You want me to be your guinea pig," Fade stated dryly. It made sense. Brimstone wouldn't want to risk any of the agents that have been faithfully following him for years. He should risk the one who hurt them.

"You can refuse. Killjoy insists its safe, but I understand if you don't feel comfortable trusting your life to untested equipment. I won't make you do it."

It was risky, but what choice do they have? She was the best agent for the job. Brimstone was lucky she had fears greater than untried portal travel.

"When do I go?"

In three nights, they sent her off. It was a strange, distorting feeling. When she stepped through on the other side, Fade had to catch her breath and slow her pounding heart.

The inbound terminal was abandoned, thankfully. Killjoy had no idea what would greet Fade on the other side, so she had come heavily armed in case of a fire fight.

Fade silently and swiftly scouted the area. The building was quiet, but she could sense fear all around her. A city full of terror. Yet she could not exactly pinpoint why.

Fade spared a moment to wonder if her Omega double made the same deal with Nightmare as her. If she shared the same fears or the same motives. She wondered if she slept at all.

When she found another terminal for the portal on Alpha to breach to, Fade knew it was time to go home and report back to Brimstone.

Killjoy and a weary Neon were waiting for her when she stepped through the portal. A wave of exhaustion rippled through Fade as her feet planted on familiar ground. Killjoy bounced around her like a hyperactive puppy, peppering her with questions about the travel and what Omega was like. Fade could barely comprehend her. Neon, who had used up quite a charge to keep the portal up and running for hours, snapped at Killjoy to leave Fade alone until she had rested. Fade appreciated that, but knew she wouldn't be resting.

She made her way back to her room, barely acknowledging the mumbles of "Welcome back". Her senses were dulled as she walked listlessly through the halls until she found her dorm. There wasn't much in it to mark the room as hers, but Fade couldn't help but feel like she returned home.

First things first, she sent a voicemail to Brimstone, who was in his office on the Range. She sat on the edge of her bed and spoke into her phone with direction, yet she didn't even remember what she said. She didn't register hitting the 'end call' button, nor collapsing onto the mattress as a sigh escaped her lips. She had owned multiple beds over the years of bounty hunting, and this one by far was the softest.

The countless nights of wakefulness had caught her. Fade didn't remember closing her eyes and slipping into the black abyss.

"Hazal."

"No..."

"You made a deal with the Devil, Hazal. You made your choice."

"Go away. Leave me alone."

Laughter. "I cannot. You and I are one. Soon, you will be mine."

"Stop."

"Time is ticking."

"WAKE UP!"

Fade bolted up from her bed, gasping for breath and drenched in cold sweat. The cruel laughter of the Nightmare still echoed in her head. She sprang out of bed as if the blankets burned her. She rubbed her shaking hands together and paced the floor, muttering to herself in attempts to calm her racing heartbeat.

Once she had settled down enough, Fade practically ran from her bedroom, wanting to be anywhere but there. She found herself in the kitchen and automatically moved to the coffee maker.

"A little late for coffee, don't you think?"

Fade was far too observant to be caught off guard, so she was surprised to find Cypher sitting at a table behind her with a steaming mug in his hands. She cursed her frayed nervous for making her sloppy.

"What do you have, then?" Fade scoffed as she snatched a mug from the cabinet.

"Tea. It's quite calming. Would you like some?"

"Isn't that the expensive tea you hoard for yourself?"

"It is, but you look like you could use some."

Fade raised an eyebrow, feigning offense. She knew his fears, but otherwise the information broker was difficult to read with the mask. His tone was often pleasant and in good humor, and this was no exception.

"You have dark circles under your eyes that grow darker every day. Your skin is paler than normal, your eyes go in and out of focus, and there are bags underneath them. Otherwise, you look as lovely as ever, my dear."

Fade huffed. She sometimes forgot there were some people on the Protocol as observant as her. "I'll stick to my caffeine, thanks."

A silence stretched between them aside from the whirring of the coffee brewer. Once her cup was full of black coffee, Fade started to leave.

"If you're going to stay awake, maybe you and I can discuss the intel you collected from your trip to Omega."

Fade thought about it for a moment, then shrugged. "Fine. Anything to keep me awake."

"Brimstone mentioned you saying something like that," the Moroccan agent remarked as she sat across from him. "And I've taken note of your nightly activities. Are your nights plagued with nightmares?"

"You wanted to talk about Omega," Fade cut in snappishly. The team despised her for blackmailing them with their nightmares. She wasn't about to reveal to them that she had nightmares of her own.

Cypher raised his gloved hands in surrender. "All right. If staying awake is what you want, I'll help you with that. However, if you ever wish to seek a solution for your sleeping habits, I'm here for that as well."

As the two spies exchanged intel and secrets, the terror of the night slipped away. Cypher stayed up with her long into the night until the sun peeked over the horizon and enveloped them through the window in a soft, rose glow. Fade could never bring herself to say it, but she was grateful for his company. More than the information broker could ever know.