help im so confused on my feelings now

looking back i think i still love him

Dude i love him sm hes just so handsome bro omg man dude i just love him sm i wish he knew how much id give up just to be with him god man he's my favorite person honestly i forget about everything and everyone when he's around my mood just shifts sm he makes me so happy

i wish i was able to tell him everything about how i feel and depend on him bruh he just provides sm comfort to me man i just want a hug from him so he could tell me everything fine and i can always depend on him if i need too man bruh i just love him ik i said it already but i rlly do he put the biggest smile on my face when i see him walk in the room but i just wished i could talk to him so easily its become such a struggle to even have a conversation with him while hes with other people its like bruh man when we're alone its sm easier to just talk to him cuz there's no one to take his attention away from me

my god man besides that he's just easy to talk to when i can my problems just disappear like omg dude i sound crazy but it rlly is what it is i just feel safe with him like i could rant about my dumb poopy old school friends and he'd make me laugh even tho what they do to me is bad he'd turn the mood around and make it better bro like that type of man is the absolute best

i just wished he didnt have an online gf he's never met before because i rlly just cant live with that fact that he have someone else it makes me feel bad bro they dont even look as good together as me and him do im actually 2 cents from just telling him how i feel but i dont wanna ruin something thats just safe for me and our friendship the fact that he's super nice with everyone is just the best