It was a peaceful monday morning in the 🅱🅾🅾🅱/EXO 2.0 household. Everyone was having a nice quiet sleep time before a little fagit decided to blast Call Me Baby around the fucking house like ain't nobody was sleeping.
"Nigga if you don't shut the fuck up with that damn music, I will personally shove the stereo up your fucking asshole!!" Toad yelled from the other side of the house.
"Please shove it up my ass B))."
"Typical Len." Angay muttered before going back to sleep to dream about her Mexican ways.
Len sighed and blew a blow horn around the house, "Get your asses up fagits! We have to get to school so we can enter the raffle to meet EXO!!"
"Isn't school for learning though?" Lini the asian asked.
"Only asians go to school to learn nigga," Toad yawned walking out her/Angay's room "I only go there to wreck shit and free lunch."
"Leave it to the black people to be free loaders. No wonder slavery and segregation happened." Base muttered under her breath.
"Ok, enough chit chat fagits! Lets go get ready for school!" Len exclaimed.
It took everyone a while to get to school because Lini was taking firever to pick the perfect red beanine even though they were all the same exact beanie. No one could get Crrisia up until someone yelled "SEHUN IS HERE!" and she immediately got up but later threatened to kill everybody when she found out he really wasn't. We had to get Len to stop shoving stuff up his ass, as usual. Angay tried to mow the lawn and make tacos at the same time but Toad quickly stopped her by whispering gay shit in her ear. Fin repeatedly trued to bomb the house to start his plan of committing genocide. Base was doing shit Germans do idk nigga. And some other shit happened but I'm to lazy to write it all.
Eventually everyone was piled into a big white van, you know the one the pedos use? yeah that one, with Fin driving. No one knows who let him drive but we just went with it asking no questions.
Ok so shit went down on the way to school and everyone ended up late as fuck. Making Fin drive was a bad idea because he supposedly he knew a "shortcut" so we can be early to school but this nigga thought a quick way would be to go the opposite direction of the fucking school which made no sense but was logical in his mind at the time. He ran all the red lights for no reason. Did we get caught? no because we are fucking savages. But blah blah blah shit happened and we ended up late, so moral of the story, NEVER let Fin drive.
As we all got out the car one bye one, a thought crossed Lini's mind. "Wait...Does Fin even have a drivers license?"
"That's a great question actually, do you?" Gaybert asked and everyone looked at Fin.
"We don't talk about that." Fin left it at that and just walked away inside the school.
(ok lets just skip to the raffle bc we all know 🅱🅾🅾🅱 squad aint learn shit maybe lini bc she's asian)
"Alright everyone, time to announce the winner if the raffle!" the principal, Mr. Nigga, announced.
"If we win, I'm gonna go to church every sunday." Toad promised. (thats a lie bc i havent been to church since like 2013 rip)
"You need it the most." Len said with Gaybert and Angay agreeing.
"Says the people who almost gave someone a handjob, done anal AND ate ass, and gave someone a blowjob." Lini brought up.
"This is why you're asian lini."
":')"
"Never have I ever done anal, its bad," Angie commented.
"I haven't but Kiana's mom has." Len muttered under his breath, but we all him so I don't know why he tried to be all secretive and shit.
"OK! Well that was fun, goodbye." Kiana exclaimed.
"Um excuse me, but can you niggas back there please shut the fuck up because I'm trying to announce the winner of the raffle," the principal said slightly annoyed.
"No." Crrisia said blankly.
"Ok, well the raffle number is......420666."
"DAMMIT ITS NOT ME!" (dats len)
"UGH REALLY!" (dats angay)
"FUCK ME IN THE ASS!" (dats gaybert)
"CURSE THE AFRICANS IN MY VAGINA!" (dats lini)
"ITS BECAUSE IM BLACK!" (dats me but im not black)
"Guess I have to kill the person who won to take their ticket and see sehun...." (yeah we know who that is)
"o dats me." base said confused. (rip base)
"Well fuck me in the ass and call me clarence, Base actually won," Toad smiled, but it was a real nigga smile, not no broke ass gay smile.
"Sorry Base, but now I have to kill you, you're not stopping me from seeing Sehun. It was nice knowing you."
"Wait Christa, the winner gets 14 free tickets to see them. Chill." Lini explained.
"Oh....... well then I guess Base doesn't have to die today."
"WE'RE MEETING EXO!!!" Len yelled.
"Time to fight Jongdae for dominance, there can only be one Chen!!"
"I can finally shove Baekhyun up my ass B)."
"I can fuck Sehun now."
"Kyungsoo can live in my vagina and take care of my Africans for me."
"Yeah I feel sorry for EXO...." the assistant principal sighed.
im ending it here so bc why not bye
idk when the next chapter is gonna be out rip
