His, and His Only

4

As I was walking home from tonight's shift the crisp and humid air swept through downtown, everything closed down already and the sun rising slightly overhead as it was now 7 in the morning. Our club closes at 6 in the morning and I took about 30 minutes to count everything and hide it all in my socks, then take my makeup off and get changed into street clothes. I pushed up my backpack and walked up the stairs to my apartment with slight huffs from the long night.

I took off my boots and put on my slippers, placed my backpack down on the floor and let myself fall face first into the bed and sighed. "What the fuck did I just do..." I gulped.

I've never let anyone do anything like that to me. I've been dancing for 6 years now and I stuck with this policy that I would never let anyone do anything like that to me. He was different for some reason.

But I need to stay careful because I know this is a game like every other. He wasn't rough with me, he didn't insult me, he gave me actual pleasure. I'll have to stop thinking about this soon, just because he was nice to me once doesn't mean he will be nice to me next time we meet. He did claim he owned me now. That could mean anything with how the world is.

I pushed myself off the bed and walked into my bathroom, I took everything off but when I got to my stuffed socks I stood there for a second with a disbelieved scoff. Then I pulled down my thigh socks, letting all of the cash fall to the floor. I stared at it for a few seconds. I can't believe I made 4,800$... 8 hours with him. They didn't interrupt us once and the waitress was fired immediately after she ran out of the room because she ran to the manager about Dabi. I was worried I was going to be fired but apparently he's a big name in this city.

I kind of wish I knew he was a big name before I let him do those things to me because if anyone found out, I could easily become a massive target here.

I never fall for big names, never fall for a pretty face, nor even sweet words when you first meet. I have to meet your soul to even begin to fall for you or be swayed in that way. I've spent a long time being used for a big name, being used for a pretty face, people swaying me with sweet words only to trick me in the end or for me not to realize until it's too late that they had something against me all along for whatever reason. Revenge, hatred for how I was born, anything really.

I don't trust easy because of my past but I will always be kind, you never know what someone has to go home to at the end of the day and I always try not to add to anyone's pain. Never kind enough to get myself into danger like I used to but, I'm not a hero anyways. I'm just a whore to society and it's my place. It always has been. I can't trick myself into thinking this person will continue being kind to me when I don't even deserve it.

I grabbed all the cash and stuffed it into a plastic bag and stuffed that bag under the sink, hidden away for now under some products. I started a shower and let the water warm up before I stepped in to let myself be engulfed by the hot water. I felt my body raise with goosebumps. The heat is so similar to how his body felt.

I washed my entire body, looking back on all the bruises and marks he gave me, they were sensitive to the touch and I couldn't help but blush over them. I slapped myself in the face and continued washing my body, "don't be an idiot, ____. You know better than that," I said softly to myself.

Being an idiot is all I know sometimes though. I can read all the books and soak up all the information I can in the world but I can't study for life. You have to truly live life to understand it and even then you still don't.