So Maybe I'm Not Okay

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-Unedited

TW: Death

Mama hadn't payed me any attention. She had been more focused on finding the perfect cake for my 6th birthday. So I had taken it upon myself to find something that would doctor my boredom. I slowly crept towards the bakery door and tried to open it. To my dismay the tattle tale sound of the bell echoed through the store. Mama turned around and gave me a disapproving look. She began scolding me but once she realized I wasn't paying attention she had me sit down next to the baker's son.

Mrs. Mitchell was a courteous lady. She would hand out candy to the kindergarten class and always had a complement ready for everyone. And so It always took people by surprise when they learned that Lorenzo was her son. Unlike his mother Lorenzo was a stuck up know it all with an attitude sourer than a lemon.

I sat facing a way from him. I was still upset that he had called me a cry baby because I had screwed him over for line leader. (Which is not true) He either didn't take the hint or didn't care.

"Why do you always wear pigtails?" He reached over and tugged on a strand of hair. I let out an annoyed sigh and crossed my hands over my chest. This was going to be a long day.

"Because they're cute" He let go of my hair.

"Oh, I thought you were trying to look more like a pig" I turned around and let out a gasp. He just smiled like the little devil he was. Before I could form a sentence he plucked out one of my purple hair ties. Still too stunned to speak I watched him stand up and throw it away. He came back and did the same to the other one.

"There you still look ugly but now you don't look like a pig." I just sat there jaw dropped. This had to be illegal in all 50 states. To my dismay he grabbed a fist full of my dark brown hair and started examining it. Hours might have passed but he still stared at my hair as if it held all of the universe's secrets. After what felt like years he let go all except for a singular strand. My shoulder length hair fell back down now a very big mess. Mama would be very upset. He brought up the offensive strand so that it was right between my eyes.

"You have split ends." He said it as if the thought revolted him. He began raving on about how his blond hair was silky and luxurious. Whatever that meant. After his rant he moved on to my eyes called them boring and weird after that he moved on to my choice of clothing. I loved my blue dress with it's yellow lemons but he clearly didn't. I leaned back and closed my eyes hoping he would shut up.

The gods must of decided to answer my cry for help because Mrs. Mitchell asked Lorenzo if he had done is Arithmetic yet. Miraculously he fell silent. A fluster quickly took over his tan skin. He abruptly stood up and ran away. And so I was alone again. But that was better than having Lorenzo for company.

Just when I was starting to give up the door opened letting out that same ring through the bakery. Mr. Robinson walked in. He was in his 60 and his hair had already started receding to the point that he had a huge chunk missing in the front. He had a grey mustache that reminded me of a comb. He was wearing a huge grey and red winter jacket even though it was spring.

When nobody was looking I quickly slipped out of the shop. Unfortunately I wasn't fast enough my fingers got caught in the door. I let out a yelp and immediately regretted it. I couldn't afford to get caught. Slowly I pushed the door careful not to set off the stupid bell. Tears swelled in my eyes while I cradled my throbbing fingers.

I sat down on the curb of the street. I hadn't thought about what I would do once I got outside. It was a pleasant day. The day was warm and the flowers were starting to bloom. There was a breeze that ruffled my hair and dress. It wasn't a troublesome breeze it was the kind that tickled your face and made you feel extraordinarily pretty.

After some thinking decided to got the park I knew the way and it wasn't to far away. Mama wouldn't notice if I was gone for a bit. As I skipped I stared at the different shops that lined Ivory street. Halfway through crossing the street I realized I had forgotten to look both ways like Mrs. Apple blossom had taught us. I heard the harsh squeal of rubber. turning to my right I watched in horror as red car speeded my way.

In the drivers seat there was a woman with bright red hair and green eyes. Her pretty face was contorted in horror. She tried turning away but she wasn't fast enough. A corner of the car slammed into me sending me flying back. For a moment all I could feel was air gliding across me before my head hit the ground shortly followed by the rest of my body.

The feeling was agonizing, it was almost as if someone was deliberately stabbing my skull. I let out a howl of pain. My head felt unnaturally light. Everything was spinning. I gripped the side of my head that was throbbing it felt warm and wet. I opened my eyes and looked over. All I could see was red I felt nauseous. I scrunched my eyes close praying it would go away.

Voices. I couldn't tell whether if they were in my head or if they were real. No matter how hard I tried I couldn't tell what they were saying. I opened my eyes again and looked at my palms. Everything was a blur but I knew they were slick with blood and perspiration.

Everything hurt. Even breathing itself felt too tiresome. Flashing red and blue lights dotted my blurry vision.
I closed my eyes and let the darkness lull me to sleep.

I'll be okay.

Notes
I wrote this for the sake of writing so a lot of things probably don't add up. Like the way

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⏰ Last updated: Nov 10, 2022 ⏰

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