Ben Shapiro sat down, letting his seat embrace him like his wife and kids don't. He thought to his pompus self "time to teach those cultural marxists and their woke agenda a lesson" and "you know who hasn't had a challenge in a long time, the trans community. It's time that I rekindle the light of hatred and discrimination against the transgenders who've lived without oppresion for too long, I should put them in their place".
He opened Youtube to the sight of a new Matt Walsh video, a Hasanabi video and a new CardiB and Megan Thee Stallion song called "WAB" alongside various other videos by his favourite conservative cucks "Hank Pecker" and "Sernie Banders" however he thought he should cover the new song first before Matt Walsh gets to it. Everyone seems to comment at the daily wire that there is sexual tension between the two of them but Ben would never want to admit his feelings for Matt out of fear of how it could affect his relationship with the one true president of the US of A Donald J Trump. So he clicked on the video and to his horror he saw his wife was one of the directors of the music video so he got his phone out and began to message his wife.
Ben: Hello wife dearest, did you happen to direct the music video for "WAB" by CardiB and Megan Thee Stallion?
His wife: Indeed I did
Ben: Is that what you were doing on the nights you had to work late after you tucked me in and told me that wet ass pussys aren't real and thus I shouldn't be afraid of them, I thought you were beating gay people to death in the alleyway
His wife: I'm sorry Benny, it had to be done we needed the money
Ben: what else were you lying to me about? next thing I know you'll be telling me wet ass pussys are real
His wife: I'm sorry Benny but wet ass pussys are real and not just a product of a yeast infection, the truth is you just haven't ever satisfied me and I know you wouldn't take it well if I told you the truth
Ben: Well what does "WAB" even mean?
His wife: Wet ass bussy...
Ben: what is a bussy?
His wife: a boy pussy, your asshole
Ben: I can't believe you'd betray both me and our lord and saviour...Donald J Trump
His wife: Well actually Ben, I've been meaning to tell you that I want a divorce, me, Joe and Jill Biden are getting married but don't worry I'm sure you wont be lonely with Matt Walsh around will you? we all know that there is something going on with you two
Ben never responded, he only pondered various responses in his mind but none of them would satisfy him, now he knew how that felt. Soon enough he saw on Fox news that his wife had publicly announced her engagement to Joe and Jill Biden as they viciously mocked Ben live on TV. He was humiliated, degraded much like his fantasies with Matt. Soon enough he appeared at Ben's door glistening in the sunlight with sweat, Ben felt something but didn't want to acknowledge it as he slowly opened the door.
"Is that a freedom loving gun in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?" Matt asked with intrigue but Ben didn't respond. Suddenly Matt had dominantly pushed his way into Ben's house and found his way to his bedroom at which point Matt began to take off his belt and get undressed, Ben did the same. Ben was enthralled at the sight of Matt's six pack but as Matt was about to breed him JrEg (the mayor of Ottawa) and Hasanabi descended from the heavens to teach them a lesson, JrEg and Hasanabi bred Ben and Matt viciously for the rest of the night. Matt made Ben a man that night, Ben thought he saw god and Matt met Jesus.
*8 WEEKS LATER*
Matt and Ben discovered they were pregnant with JrEg and Hasanabi's children and they thought they should make their relationship public information so they announced it live on the daily wire embracing each other at the end, Ben finally felt equally reciprocated love
*7 MONTHS LATER*
Matt and Ben give birth to their marxist and socialist children but are euthanised promptly afterwards as Ben had a terminal illness called "Ben Shapiro-citis" and Matt also had a terminal illness called "Matt Walsh-itis" Matt was the first one to be euthanised by Hasanabi who said that he would crush Matt Walsh's head in between his thighs live if they raised $500,000 blood painted the wall and Ben screamed and was aware of his impending death when the donation bar reached $5,000,000 Hasanabi crushed Ben's head in between his thighs with so much force everyone within a 300 mile radius of the hospital had to be admitted to hospital which was now possible under our president and lord Bernie Sanders.
*22 YEARS LATER*
Ben and Matt's sons, Fleance and Macbeth became the first homosexual presidents of the world and for their inauguration, they shot King William of England live, eliminating every monarchy in the world.
*103 YEARS LATER*
The whole world gather to witness as Fleance and Macbeth die together in a bed, throughout their reign they got rid of world hunger, ate every rich person and brought anarcho-communism to the world and the people of space etc.
Everyone lived happily ever after, no-one ever wanted for anything, capitalism was no more and naked statues of Fleance, Macbeth, Hasanabi and JrEg were erected across the universe and good shit happened for the rest of eternity and Fleance's child eventually prevented the big crunch 99,999,999,874 years after their father's death. Society has transcended past the need for gender.
