The Broken Mirror

I stood there, frozen. Afraid. Astonished of what she had just done to me. Who is this monster? What has this, he done to her? Her eyes glared at me, darting through my eyes into my soul. Her clenched teeth and fists shook, her brain realising what she had just done. But they grew tighter. I backed away and ran. Ran as far as I could from that creature. My body ached and my face stung but I had to get away. I now hated her. I hated it all.

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I laughed, the suns strokes shining across my face. I opened the car door and jumped in, Porsha doing the same. "Mum! We had the funniest day at school!" I exclaimed.
"Yeah! Mariah had to pretend she hated me in Drama because..." Porsha added, but she was cut off by my mum.
"Porsha, I'm sorry. This is not a good time."
"Mum!" I said quietly.
"No. It's okay. I, I don't have to come over tonight. I'll... walk home," Porsha stuttered, scrambling out of the car, and shrugging her shoulders at me. I sat back in the chair. There was a deep silence as my mum drove away from the school but finally, her words broke the air. "You father lost his job today." The words ricocheted around my head, on repeat in her monotone voice.

Lost his job, your father lost his job.

Lost his job.

I took a deep breath and looked over to my mum. A tear wept out of her eye and I looked down, afraid of saying the wrong thing. So we sat there in silence the whole way home.

My dad was sitting on the last chair in the dining room, his head rested on the table. I swallowed the gigantic rock slicing my throat and sat down next to him. He looked up, his eyes red, and sat up to face me. "Don't give me that look. I know you're disappointed with me," he whispered. I shook my head. "I'm not disappointed with you dad! Yeah, I'm upset. Shocked. But you'll find another job. I'm positive!" I reassured him. He smiled but I don't think my cheering up worked. I spun around to the sound of my mother's voice. She was standing in the doorway, a stern look on her face. "Zane. I need to speak with you. Privately." She walked off and my dad leaned in to me. "Listen, kiddo. Don't let whatever your mum says or does shake you." And with that he got up and left. I'm not quite sure what he meant, but it'll be that one phrase that never leaves your mind. And then my worst nightmare occurred. My parents are fighting. "Zane! I cannot believe what you have done! Don't dare speak a word to me! Your job was all we had! What now? You better start looking or else!" I hear her storm off up the stairs and I run over to my dad in the other room. "Mariah, GET OUT!" He slammed the door on my face. A tear trickled down my face and as if in slow motion, smashed to the floor.

It has been several months since that day. The day that changed my life forever. And you'd think with time it would be a distant, resolved memory, but instead it's the exact opposite. And it's getting worse. My dad has done nothing but neglected the problem. He sits in the back room watching TV all day, a butt-shaped imprint has even been left on the couch. He has gained about 15 kilograms, refusing to eat my mum's food. Sometimes I worry about him. Feeling guilty for hating him like my mum does. But then I remember why she does and I hate him again. My mum isn't coping. With her petty little job at the local Target, she's got tiny pay checks coming in. Which supposedly are to pay for the bundle of bills barging through our doors. She cries herself to sleep. Just now I hear her muffled cries as I finish crying myself. I decide to call up Porsha. "Hey Porsha. Can I talk to you?"
"Of course! What's up?" she replies.
"I don't think I'm coping. With all this. I just want to shout and wish my dad never lost his job! Why me! WHY MY FAMILY?" I cried.
"Mariah! Mariah. It's okay. Talk to your dad. Tell him he has to find a job to help your family survive! He only listens to you."
"I can't talk to him. I can't stand his face. He disgusts me. How can he just sit there and think we aren't going to be homeless soon. How can he just sit there thinking we have enough money to pay for everything. For food! How can he just sit there, drinking bottle after bottle, isolating himself from his family. From the world. AND THINK EVERYTHING IS OKAY!" I screamed into the phone slamming it into the walls that I thought kept my emotions together. I crouch into a ball, rocking back and forth. My body shakes uncontrollably. I just want this to be over.

My body fills with rage. I thrash away my bed sheets and race down the stairs. My eyes are set on that front door. To get away. My body is moving too fast for my legs and they collapse beneath me smashing my face on the floor. I look up to see two feet standing before me. "Where are you going?" my dad says, sluggishly. I hear footsteps thumping down stairs towards me. The anger vibrates from her steps and wraps around the air. She drags me up from the floor by my shoulders and sinks her daggered eyes through me. I've never seen this side of my mum before. She shoves me to the ground and grabs me by the collar, smacking my face into the tiles. Hammers were bashing against my head but I couldn't feel any of my body. My dad helped me up and shook his head walking away. I stood there, heaving. I couldn't believe what she had just done to me. I backed away and ran. I scuttled up the stairs away from that monster. I kicked over my full-length mirror, the tiny pieces of my useless life shattering to the ground. Every piece of messed up memory after memory. The bigger pieces pierced my skin, blood smearing the floor but I couldn't feel it. Instead my eyes grew darker and I blacked out. Warping into the floor beneath me.

I'm sorry dad, I let her shake me.