How do you love me?
Look into my eyes
Look at the monster I've become
The night was inky and hushed. Little movement and noise took place except for the pitter-patter of your footsteps upon the stone stairs. The quiet, light sounds echoed off the apartment building's outer walls, disappearing into Tokyo's soft hum. As you came to your apartment's door, you gulped. You pressed your ear to the cold metal and listened. Inside, the soft snores of your boyfriend, Erwin, could be heard. You let out a small sigh of relief, and as silently as possible, opened the door cautiously.
Stepping inside, the small apartment had become cavernous and pitch black, giving a new meaning to the word "eerie". It was the suspense of whether or not Erwin would wake and find you that gave you the chills. Inaudibly, you tiptoed through the labyrinthine apartment, making your way through the kitchen to the bedroom, and finally the bathroom.
Shutting the door with a soft click, you flipped the light switch, only to see a horrendous sight in front of you. A mirror. It wasn't the mirror itself, but rather the image it reflected. It displayed a person with one normal, [color] eye and one black and red eye. Their clothes were stained with dirt and saliva. Their [color] skin was bruised and cut. Their [length], [color] hair was a knotted mess, soaked with a deep red liquid. Blood stains trickled from the corners of their mouth. A truly ugly sight. It had been a month since you last saw your ghoul-form, but nonetheless, it still made you feel revolted at the sight.
"Monsters, all of them." The sentences echoed in your mind.
"How ugly."
"How foul."
"How could one love such a creature?"
The last one was the worst of them all. "That's what I want to know..." You said trailing off. Tears formed in the corners of your eyes, threatening to fall. How had Erwin stayed so devoted to you this past year? Ever since you became half-ghoul, you had loathed yourself. You had become a creature that had no place in the two worlds of the Humans and the Ghouls. When Erwin found out after you came home late at night from a hunt, you thought he'd leave you. You thought he would despise you. You thought he would curse your name and loath you as much as you loathed yourself. But he didn't. Instead what happened was that he woke up immediately when you walked in the apartment, rushing to see why you were out so late. Initially, he was shocked to see you stained in blood, but after a moment of staring and silence, he took you to the bathroom and helped wash you up. You could recall this memory as if it were only yesterday. You had just sat lifelessly in the bath as he scrubbed your hair and skin, removing blood and any other stains. He hadn't left you, but instead cared for you and loved you.
The memory made the tears trail down your face, leaving salty tracks upon your rosy cheeks. Soft sobs escaped your lips as more tears fell from your eyes, all of the memories of him flooded into your mind. Erwin had never left your side in all your endeavors in trying to live a normal life while being half-ghoul. He stayed right next to you, helping you up when you fell down, encouraging you, and never letting go. He had loved you and protected you when the rest of the world abandoned you. And for that, you could never thank him enough.
You were pulled from your memories when you heard a faint knock at the door. "[Name]? Are you in here? I'm coming in." Erwin called in a hushed voice.
"No!" You cried, flinging yourself on the door to keep it from opening. "D-Don't come in here!"
"Well why not?"
"I'm not- I'm in the bath!" You said, coming up with an excuse for Erwin to leave you alone.
You heard him sigh on the other side of the door. "[Name]?"
"Yes?"
"Why won't you really let me in?"
The air was void of sound for a long moment. "I don't want you to see me like- this." You said in reference to your ghoul state. You remembered the promise you had made with yourself after the night Erwin first learned of your new abilities. You promised to never let him see this hideous side of you again.
"Is that all?"
"Yes." You said, releasing your grip on the door knob and leaning your forehead against the cool wood. You felt the knob slowly turn in your hand and the door start to open. You backed away from it, knowing Erwin wouldn't take no for an answer. Your head hung low as you felt the cool air from the bedroom waft into the room. A pair of strong arms embraced you, hugging you close into his chest.
After what seemed like hours, Erwin gently brought you out of his arms and gazed down upon your figure. He brushed the tears from your eyes away and smoothed down your hair. "[Name], you're as beautiful as ever." He said with a soft smile. He started to pull you back into a hug, until you pushed him away.
You peered up into his icy blue orbs with your own- now normal- [color] eyes. "Erwin?"
"Yes?"
"How is it that you stay so devoted to me, even when I'm like this?" You said as your eyes started to drift back to the ground.
He cupped your face with his hands, lifting it up to meet his. "I would love you no matter if you were a ghoul, an alien, a ghost, et cetera. As long as you're the [Name] I know and love, I'll stay right by your side."
"Really?"
"Really. Now let's get you washed up and in bed, it's almost 1 o'clock." He said with a slight chuckle.
I love you for you
Neither your species or race
But rather the you who loves me
And nothing will ever change that
YOU ARE READING
Erwin x Reader Collection
FanficA collection of Erwin x Reader one-shots that I have written.
