Cookie run smut

Nuts in yo puss 👹💋

{Ok first off this will be a goofy ah, attempt at a X reader story, once again to clarify my friend Onix on discord gave me this story they wrote, we are both high as Fuck Rn, and where giggling so I posted it so please enjoy, or not I honestly don't care lmao}

A dark night was glossed over the city, staining the sky a deep color of black, not a star shined in the dark pool of night, it was strange but calming. You sipped your tea listening to the same old music as you did every night, nothing ever felt different now in Days, everything's been so boring. Why is that? Well you didn't really know but you wish you did. a knock echoed threw the hall way, you lived in a apartment so this must have been on your neighbors door. A Commotion was heard and a gunshot rung threw the hallway, moments passed you where frozen with shock. Finally after a few moments of you calming down you peaked from out of your door, and saw a man bleeding out on your door step, you freaked out "WHAT THE FUCK?!" you screamed like any rational person would, grabbing the man you brought his bleeding body to the bath tub, treating his wounds you waited, hoping there wasn't a dead man in the tub, his eyes opened "What?" He said, you noticed the hair on his head with slightly gray at the tips, "so he must be a old turd" you thought to yourself, you went to get the man some ice. a while ago you worked as a nurse but soon found yourself quitting after terrible experience's with your co-workers. Placing the cold ice this on his side you sat by him "So what's your name old dude?" You asked in the most weird fashion to ask someone who almost fucking died "Almond?" He asked still hella confused about his surroundings, you noded and gestured for him to hold the ice pack, grabbing a few pills from your cabinet you showed him the bottle, so he wouldn't think you where drugging him "Ok these are pain killers take some of these, and try not to die in my tub, cause I don't Wana drag a nasty ass corpse outta my bath" he took the medication, and you found him passing out "Fuck are you dead?!-" he wasn't after you said that snoring was heard. You sighed, you watched him (Non creepily) and soon found yourself passed out, in the morning you awoke to see the same old face sleeping, you poked it "WHAT THE FUCK?! WHERE AM I?!" he screamed, this scared you causing you to slam your head onto the cabinet and hurt yourself. Moments later after explaining he got shot and ate shit and ended up on your doorstep, he understood "Why didn't you call a ambulance?" He asked you "Cause I got nervous" witch was true, but also the other part about that was the fact you didn't wana see your previous coworkers. You noticed a badge on his left nip "Hey, old fart why did you drag your ass the whole way over here anyways?" He backhanded you "I'm 36 thank you! Also I'm a detective it's my job" realizing your the same age was definitely a experience, stitting up you got up to his level, trying to act like you didn't just get backhanded like a hoe. "Ok then, I didn't ask your age but anyways why where you at my neighbor's?" He thought for a moment "Cause you're neighbors a meth head" this shocked you, the only thing you thought about your neighbors appearance was the fact he looked like a jacked up Santa, but not that "Well Fuck me running and call me Sally I had no clue" this last sentence dragged into a large conversation that lasted hours other than the fact, he looked to be like 60 he was really well into the stuff you where, you found yourself being into the same things, and Hobby's this was really a nice experience and flirting started and flirting led to spicy conversation. "So Wana Fuck?" You asked nonchalantly, "Yeah sure whatever" even though the man had a gunshot wound in his left kidney that didn't stop him from fucking you like a Trojan soldier, taking your Britney spears shirt off and pants you where fully, naked and afraid. And so was he still with a fucking hole in his left kidney, you began to spicy style make out, witch led to Hickeys in places there shouldn't be hickeys. Like his nutsack (😭)