Chapter Nineteen

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Recap;

"Ma'am, you can't just walk out of he-"

"Actually I can, if he hasn't bitten you, then he's not a danger. Just because he snaps doesn't mean he's a danger, everybody is entittled to a bad day, especially after what we both went through." I say, "Samson. Come." I say, my voice firm and I turn already hearing Samsons soft pads behind me, I knew he would be okay.

He was still my Samson.

With a little time and a lot of effort, Samson will be back to being himself. Or as himself as he can get now.

~

Chapter Nineteen

I had no choice but to show up to the office this morning, so I had to bring Samson with me and he was actually doing really well.

Samson had a cast, a bundle of sorts wrapped around the end of his butt, a small white cotton bob, almost like a bunny tail met my eyes and at first I had a hard time adjusting to seeing it.

But, Samson was so in tune to me, my feelings and almost seemed to snap back to his training. Although I was grateful he wanted to protect me, I still wanted to learn more about fighting and protect myself.

I was now at my desk, typing away responding to an email from one of the directors of the building downstairs, when the door to the office bursts open and in strides Holten.

He slams the door closed and throws a hand through his dark locks and throws himself down into his chair with a huff, typing angrily at his desk.

"Is something wrong?" I ask.

My voice was small in the big echoey room and it somehow seeed to disappear into the air before it could get very far, leaving me in silence.

"Nothing you need to worry yourself about." Holten snaps, keeping his dark green eyes trained onto his computer screen.

"Are you mad at me somehow?" I ask, tilting my head trying to decipher what I was feeling.

"I'm not mad Raven." Holten says, with a heavy sigh turning away from his computer screen and trail his eyes up to my face, settling on my face.

"It seems like it."

I want Holten, but he was the one who had told me to see if anything is there with Caiden.

"I love you Raven, I knew this from the moment you fell into my arms, I want you to be with me, but I cannot force you to choose me. So, it was either press forward and risk losing you all the way, or let you go and be happy and still get to be in your life."

"You think I would be happy if I left you?" I asked him.

My shoulders and chest haves with the effort to breath as Holtens eyes smolder into my own, the intensity sending rippling goosebumps soaring over my body, my heart thumps wildly in my chest.

He was everything my entire being called out for, inside and out, body, heart and soul.

"You tell me Raven, since we met you've let Caiden wrap you around his finger, I let him train you because I have done things in my past I don't want dredged up, but that still doesnt explain the fact you two had basically dry humped each othe-" Holten halts all words coming out of his mouth and his eyes widen, but the damage had already been done.

The words and tone that come out of Holtens mouth stung, but they rang true. I had let Caiden worm his way through my bodies walls.

I knew what Caiden and I had wasn't love, but it was more of a physical push and pull, a fiery game we played that didn't stem down to anything emotional or meaningful.

What Holten and I have and what we could become was something beyond anything I've ever known could be capable between two people. He made me feel so cherished and loved, filled me with the most comforting kind of warmth and he sends my blood roaring with just a single stare, like he is doing now.

"True, I don't know why I have let Caiden take control of whatever is between us, but I don't want to anymore. Holten, I need you." I say, my voice shaky but somehow I hold strong.

"I cannot force you to be with me Raven, and I won't even try to convince you, you are worth fighting for, but I will not fight with somebody like Caiden." Holten replies with a bite at the end of his words, he all but spat out his name.

" 'Somebody like Caiden' ?" I ask.

"People like him, get whatever they want, men who have the looks and that natural pull for a woman to fall at their feet." Holten sneers, his green eyes turning a dark stone green and his nostrils flare.

"Holten, Caiden doesn't have me," I say standing up quickly and marching over to Holten, I was mad.

I was beyond mad. I was livid.

I get that he didn't want to fight for me, but maybe a little pull would have been nice and not let me throw myself to the wolves altogether.

"I am my own person Holten and I need you, you are the one that I want by my side." I said, stopping in the middle of the floor.

"How do I know that?" Holten asks, getting up and out of his chair as well to come and stand in the middle of the room, directly across and not even a foot away from me.

My arms itched to throw them around his neck, my lips ached to run along his lips and tease his skin, my heart accelerated wishing to be in his arms, and my core ached to feel him again.

All these feelings, emotions, and most of all, the desires that swirled in me from his eyes sweeping across my frame.

"I am yours Holten, I have always been yours." I whisper out.

Holten steps forward, sweeps an arm around my hips and pulls me in pressing his lips against mine without hesitation, and my heart completely explodes inside my chest.

I couldn't do the endless push and pull that I have been doing with Caiden, I knew in a way he would always mean something to me, but I needed to make up my mind with these two men, and I finally have.

I need Holten. I love him.

Not that I could voice that at the moment, I have never told anyone I loved them, except my parents and Marley in my lifetime, but in this exact moment, I knew I loved Holten by the relieved sigh that escaped my body from being inside Holten's arms, and by the resounding tingles springing over my body as we made out for a few minutes in the middle of the office room.

I knew I made the right choice, however fast it was.

Caiden I could afford to lose, he and I didn't have that much of a strong connection, but Holten I could not lose because the very thought of hurting Holten and leaving him forever to be with Caiden left me with barely enough oxygen to pass breathing and my very heart felt like it was being crumbled while in my chest.

I knew Holten was the man my very being chose as it insitvntely caved into Holten, this was something that would forever be missed with Caiden. The emotional tug, the emotional chemistry to want to know him inside and out, to want him by my side every second of the day, to want to be with him no matter what.

And that's why as I hold onto Holten and celebrate our next step in the relationship between us, I shed a tear for the severed connection between Caden and I because as of now that door is closed.

Or is it?

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