MY ANSWER

A stronger bond

During Baazigar's recordings, our relationship became closer and closer. We were good friends, very good friends.

But despite that we didn't know each other completely, it was just the fun that brought us to be together on stage in dressing rooms in rehearsals but the most personal things were saved for a while.

When we had romantic scenes I felt something inexplicable about him, suddenly I don't know what was happening to me and I lost my mind I loved to caress his hair, rub his skin and when he gave me those tender kisses on my cheeks it seemed to me the most beautiful thing in the world I enjoyed all that, and in my opinion he also enjoyed it.

On the last day of recording, he showed up early, they hadn't all arrived yet. I was reading my book as usual. I remember that I saw him enter in silence. He didn't say a single word, I was still in my business soon. He came to me and I snatched the book and said:

-What is this supposed to be?

"I gave him an interrogative look" is my book, give it to me.

-Ummm Kajol, I hadn't told you how beautiful you look today, let me tell you that you are beautiful.

-Shahrukh I'm not here for your games, please give me the book.

-Well, it's your decision, if you want the book, come for it.

Then I got up to try to take it, Shahrukh had it in his hand and lifted it very high so that it did not reach it then when I tried to take it I leaned on Shahrukh and we fell to the ground, I remember that it was on top of it all my hair fell on his face, very slowly I remove it and caressed my cheek

-What's up, Kajol, why do you stop like this? Are you afraid of me?

-No, of course not.

-Why did you walk away?

It was just my reaction, Shahrukh, don't start.

Were you uncomfortable with me? Because I was happy, no one has had such a beautiful girl in front of him.

"I was so nervous" Shahrukh my book, please give it to me.

-Okay..." he approached the armchair where I was and took my hand on my palm. I drew a heart with his finger and put my book, then he left.

Such a gesture left me surprised and more in love because I had already agreed to be in this state in love.

I decided that I should tell someone and who better to trust my secrets my mother when I got home my dad was in his studio he hugged me very tight he was happy to see me because he had been traveling for a few weeks. Then I went to look for mom. I needed to get that out of my chest and soon I went up to her room and threw myself in her bed, I immediately noticed it, I noticed my happiness and wanted to know what was happening.

-Mom, I have to tell you something.

-I was already strange that you came so excited that it happened to you, darling.

-Mom, I am madly in love, with a sweet boy, super kind, tender and fun, I just love it and best of all is that he understands me, accepts me, never judges me, tolerates my personality and loves her.

-Where could you find someone like that, daughter, who is that man with so many gifts that drives you crazy?

-Mom is Shahrukh, Shahrukh Khan.

My mom stayed in Shock, held on to the dresser and looked at me so sadly that she felt her gaze stuck in my chest.

-Mom, what's up? Are you still there?

-Kajol can't be.

-It can't be a mom, what's going on?

- Shahrukh is married daughter, he got married 2 years ago, he's not going to reciprocate.

When I heard his words, my heart broke, tears gushed from my eyes. I began to cry in an unbridled way, how could I imagine that that day was going to reveal my love to him? Why don't you inform me about these things before? How was I so stupid?

I felt like my whole world collapsed my mom was there holding me for a moment then I felt that someone was going up the stairs and I went to my room, I threw myself in bed I just felt like my warm tears brushed my cheeks, I lost track of time and looked at my watch it was time to go back to the recording set, I showered I couldn't

That day I promised not to get involved with Shahrukh again, something I could never do.

It is very hard to love a person without any hope, but it is even harder not to have hopes of loving someone ever.