The reason

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I wiped my eyes and hit play. "Okay, I'm going to tell you the reason behind all this. The reason I'm not there to cuddle you and kiss your scars." Calum frowned and I sniffled.

"Mikey, this is gonna be really hard for you, but no skipping."

"Okay, I've been depressed ever since you stopped self harming. I don't know why it started then but I slipped into a depressed state, I hid it all from you so you could smile. I began cutting and burning, I went to the doctor's to get anti-depressants and I found out something even worse." He sighed and played with the promise ring on his finger. "I've been diagnosed with brain cancer and it's too late that no amount of chemo can save me."

I gasped and paused the video again, falling to my knees on the floor and sobbing into the carpet. He killed himself, he had brain cancer. Why was he hiding all this shit from me?!

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