Dating As A Gen Z

Chapter 1: Fake Dates

Chapter 1: Fake Dates

Trying to find a perfect match is nearly impossible, well at least for me. Every single time I go on social media, I see a post with a cute story about a couple that found each other on a dating app. Then they disclose how long they've been together and BOOM wedding pics, honestly, it's pretty impressive.

It was about 3 years ago that I started college and went into the dating world. I wanted some company apart from homework and crippling depression. Due to the circumstances of the COVID-19 pandemic, I couldn't meet my prince charming at a bookstore or something of that sort. That is when online dating apps popped up in my head and there I hopped on the dating app called, hinge. Now, this app is very mortifying, the reason is due to its simplicity but yet very boring features. Here is where it all began, I matched with a boy named Jordan. How do I explain such a handsome, extravagant, and well-mannered guy? He was 5'8 and pretty great. Not only did he attend my school but he came from a good family like your parents would want you to marry right away. The man seemed like Mr. Mcdreamy from miles away. Yet there's a downside, we went on two dates in 6 months. I know it sounds crazy, but how would anyone be okay with only two dates? I was a newbie at this thing called dating. As a matter of fact, I was very open-minded and gullible.

Let's jump into the first date: Sometime in August, I think.

Arizona is hot, especially in the summer. When Jordan and I spoke on the phone we made plans to go to the drive-ins and get some food afterward. He arrived on time and was wearing the most basic attire ever: kaki tan golf shorts with a grey top and dirty white vans. I wore a black t-shirt dress with my hair dyed black and red. I looked like an e-girl and he looked like a basic rich kid pulling up in an old Mercedes.

He walked to my doorstep with full confidence. He was blowing my mind with every step he took. Then my dad opened the door and oh no. My dad met him on my first date...EVER. Poor Jordon was put on the spot and he was full-on shaking. "Hiiiiiii~ I am Jordan I am taking your daughter out to the movies". My dad being the Mexican father figure was looking him dead in the eyes. With a questionable smile, my dad gave us permission to go out. We began to drive away to what was supposed to be a perfect date....

Jordan made me smile and giggle the whole drive. By the time we arrived, we had One Direction blasting in his car. I fell in love. He wanted me to get out of my comfort zone and enjoy the evening with him. Unfortunately, I can't recall the movie but I am sure it was a good one since many came out to see it. As we chilled in the car, he sat in the back and brought out his chemistry molecule-building kit. My thoughts were all over the place since he was looking too hot and he had some intelligent nerdy side coming out. I am quite a big girl so jumping in the back wasn't easy but I managed to do so. We laughed and looked into each other's eyes. I was in love. Once the movie was about to end. I only wanted his lips pressed onto mine longer but the movie was done. He was getting too into the sexual tension that he didn't notice it was time to go. He clearly wanted to partake in what I first encountered as HOOKUP CULTURE with some mixture of more dumb things. I was starting to see Mr. Mcdreamy was not wanting us to leave until he got his fair share of fun. I began to get uncomfortable as I noticed he locked his doors and the back seats had child locks.

I stared at his dark eyes and the lust was gone. He began to kiss me more and wrapped his hands around my neck to choke me. I gasped and then a text came through my phone. I interpreted this mistake and grabbed my phone. "Who is it?" Jordan asked. I stared at my phone then stared at him. "My friend she needs me to help her with our homework due tonight," I said. He gave me a puzzled and anguished look. I could tell he was very disappointed with this response. Jordan then jumped up into the driver's seat and waited for me to do the same. By the time I started putting on my seat belt he drove in a hurry to get me home. In the car drive, he noticed an empty dark alleyway next to the train tracks. He said, "this would be the ideal spot to hang out but since you have homework we have to go". I reminded him that I was still hungry and had a craving for chicken nuggets. The man didn't care and we drove to In N Out. We ordered the double patty burgers and he lectured me on why I should be considerate to remove onions from the burger when I was on a date. I was just in shock by how demanding he was. He paid for the whole date and on the drive home after getting the food he began opening up about some personal life details. Jordan probably came from a broken home despite being wealthy. He put on dramatic music and cried about wanting to be a good father. I looked at him and mentioned that we were only 19 years old and he shouldn't have to worry about that at this moment. After the mini-drama session in the car drive, we kissed good night and I didn't see him until three months later.

In the meantime, we chatted non-stop on snap and we would call each other every week to update each other on our lives. I would ask him now and then if we could see each other but he would say he was too busy. Jordan was studying chemical engineering and completing his bachelor's with a master's at the same time. I understood he was busy but there was no way he could not set aside at least one day to see me. I often would ask for reassurance if he was actually interested in me. After several nights of crying and begging to see him, he finally decided on seeing each other in October. I didn't realize how red the flags were at the time.

I have to admit mean while I was waiting for Jordan to make time for us, I was going on dates with another guy who I did not take seriously. I would consider it fake dates because he was more like a friend than an actual love interest. I made it obvious several times that he and I were only going on dates with no purpose besides hanging out.

Second date: Mid-October spooky season date

Now I and Jordan finally went on our second date in mid-October. It was the spooky season. I asked a close friend of mine for recommendations on lovely places to go out. She recommended me this event at a very elegant five-star hotel. Jordan messaged me excitedly if he was gonna pick me up or if I meet him halfway since the hotel was closer to home. I am the type of person that takes forever to respond when I'm getting ready. By the time I responded, Jordan texted me that he was already on the way. The drive from his house to my house was almost an hour, I thought that was a sign of commitment and dedication to see the girl of his dreams.

When Jordan pulled up to my house in his cranky old Mercedes, my mom was super excited to meet him. She heard only the good so she was head over heels for this potential son-in-law. Jordan was a charmer, it came naturally to him. He had my whole family entranced with his existence and he loved the attention. I was super excited to spend a day with him since he barely ever had the time for me. The drive to the hotel was long and enjoyable. We spoke about school, politics, and ACT scores. The man was trying to figure out if I had the IQ of Albert Einstein. When we finally arrived we realized we had to pay for the actual fun and entertainment that the hotel offered. There were tickets that were sold and I didn't know. I was completely embarrassed and Jordan scolded me for not checking. We decided to still go in and enjoy what was open to the public. Jordan noticed something about me...one of my insecurities. The way I walked...I have flat feet and at school most called me a penguin. Jordan pointed it out and laughed. I was upset but the night got worse. He went on about how he was smarter and that if we had kids they would have better brain cells thanks to him. I didn't realize how bad the situation was because I was "too into him". I tried my best to ignore his inconsiderate comments. As we walked around the hotel plaza I saw the cutest plague doctor plushie! " Oh, Jordan look! I want it!" I squealed in glee. He smiled and said I could get it but as I walked up to check the tag it was $50+. I stared at the plushie and then at him and couldn't spend his money on a plushie. He then asked if I wanted dinner at the hotel's steakhouse. I saw the prices and my jaw dropped. I felt ashamed to spend his money which was not good since I didn't find myself worthy of that. I grabbed his hand and we walked around the hotel garden grounds. We people-watched and then sat to enjoy the rest of the view. Then we decided to leave and grab a bite. We walked to his car and he grabbed my hand and walked at my pace.

My stomach had butterflies and my heart was beating so fast. I was so nervous. We got to the car and he drove to In N Out again. At this point, you can say this man's favorite food was this burger franchise. Our hands held one another and I confronted him. I wanted to know why he couldn't love me the way I loved him, I wanted nothing more in the world than to keep him forever at this moment. He looked me in the eyes and it made my heart melt. He told me he was still into me. I was satisfied with that answer and we ended the night making out in his car parked at a corporation lot.

As the school year kept going, so did we. We talked more and more till he faded away. He eventually stopped texting me. The calls came to an end. Jordan was out in December. He left me heartbroken and depressed during the holidays. I noticed my skin got worse and I began gaining weight. I was dying from the inside out. I just fell into a dark hole where I found myself unlovable.

It wasn't until a couple of months after things ended that I contacted him about the reasoning. He said he was emotionally unavailable and was dealing with mental illness. I only felt a little regret about me not helping him open up more but I realized that I was unable to fix it. Relationship. this dating experience set the stage for other experiences I were to come in the future. Other than that, I realized that dating absolutely just sucks.