SidNaaz Saga: Book Of Single Shots ❤💫 (COMPLETE)

Consummation By Souls

Plot: Shehnaaz is second wife of Sidharth. They got married for Snehu.. daughter of first wife Sheena and Sidharth. Sheena & Sid got separated long back. Sidharth is giving 2nd chance to his love life!! But will this love bloom or die midst tangled circumstances

*************************************

High dive into frozen waves where, the past comes back to life,
Fight fear for the selfish pain cause it was worth it all this while,
Hold still right before we crash, because we both know how this ends, 
Clock ticks till it breaks your glass and I drown in you again...

Cause you are the piece of me, I wish I didn't need,
Chasing relentlessly, still fine and I don't know why,
If our love is tragedy, why are you my remedy? 
If our love is insanity, why are you my clarity? 

"Be my wife in the true sense. What more do want from me? You're my wife. The mother of my daughter. Now be mine."  And Shehnaaz had been. In all sense. Body, Mind & Heart.  

It took one moment for her to realise that Sidharth was never going to hers by heart. And yet, he had taken his first step, so in return she would take hers. Love be damned.  

Sidharth hadn't remembered what had transpired between them the previous night. Shehnaaz had taken the first step only to be met with hate. She needed to know what was going on in his mind at that moment and at every moment that followed. Shehnaaz couldn't let him walk away the next time. She wouldn't let her love walk away walk this time.  

That night as their daughter Snehu had been put to bed in the adjoining apartment, Shehnaaz had joined her husband. She had placed her palm on his cheek only for it to be flung away by him. Instead, she sat by him as she poured him his drinks. 

  "Be the thing Sidharth needs the most during the time of turmoil - be his wife."  

That night as Shehnaaz pushed her lips against his.. Sidharth had failed to respond. It was moments later that he had his mouth on hers as his hands wandered across her body - tracing it, feeling it, undoing every pin that held her saree blouse together. Sidharth had fondled her body as he held her against the wall. His arms traced her curves moving their way up as he seductively pulled the cloth that had been carefully draped aroundher. Shehnaaz laid there in her saree skirt and undone saree, with her legs locked around his waist. And as they lost themselves in each other Shehnaaz vowed to be his forever. Sidharth was hers - only hers to keep. They hadn't proceeded any further that night. They had just kissed after which he lost consciousness in her arms. 

"Don't leave me, I'm yours," Sidharth had mumbled against her chest.  

Why can't you be mine for once, Shehnaaz had wondered. Just once, just once, her mind had screamed.  

She had touched her swollen lips the next morning. He had glared at her as she arrived with his mocktail. Sidharth had frequented home less after that. It was either for Snehu or for a change of clothes.  

Had I repulsed him that much, Shehnaaz had wondered. Shehnaaz hadn't wept. She had lost him before she had even gained an ounce of him. Sidharth would never be hers, she had concluded all over again. 

  "First Love Rashmi, Only Love!" Shehnaaz had stared at the book at the local library as she picked Snehu's reference books. It was as if it screamed common sense whilst mocking her for her idiocy. 

  "Don't marry him, Naaz. A loveless marriage will only suffocate you." she overheard Bagga warned another.  

 A loveless marriage will only suffocate you, Bagga had said.   

"Mama," her bundle of joy ran down the school staircase and jumped right into her arms. "Let's meet, papa. Chalo, please. I haven't seen him ages." Snehu had complied. 

There Sidharth stood, with a random girl straightening him up. An intimate position that should have been hers. The girl ran her hands tracing his chest dusting non existent particles off his attire. He had looked into space until his eyes met hers.  

Shehnaaz could feel a hot tear threatening to fall off. She had turned away and breathed in 

"Snehu wants to meet you," Shehnaaz had said to which he had nodded his head. 

"I'll meet you'll at home after I get this done," Sidharth had said not turning away from her. 

He had returned the next evening. 

Shehnaaz had met him halfway as they headed towards to place that was now theirs - their bedroom. She had fallen on the bed as she held her head in her arms. 

"Why are we here? What have I done to bring me here? All I ever asked for was a family to be mine. Was that too much to ask for Sidharth? Did I ask you for anything more? Did I ask you for anything more or even love? Just companionship, hope and trust. What have we done to us, Sidharth?" Her whispers had turned into frantic cries only to turn back to sorrowful questions.  

Sidharth rushed to her side as he held her in his arms. Everything forgotten.  

"All I asked for was you to be mine. Just mine.You should have. You should've asked for more. You should've asked for more than  companionship, hope and love because you deserve more that. You deserve.." Sidharth had said as he cradled her in her arms. They had silently wept in each others arms.  

What had they done of what had to be love? What had they happened to their second shot at love? 

Buried in pieces, like some shattered glass;
Now we're shattered glass,
But it's meaningless beating that we can't get past. We just can't get past. 

Cause the harder we try the more we fall apart.  We fall apart,
It's a war we can't stop and we've lost before it stops,
Strangers and shadows, we're that desolate waiting for regret, 
And all the sorries and pain smash into our silhouettes. 

All the pain fires head on and the screams are definite, 
Now we fell through this ground to the greats standing in,
Pain in the tear drops paid for with each lie and we'll die with this heart beat.. 
Can we recognize? 

I don't think we'll survive, if we can't stop this fight. 
Can we really apologize when all our words collide? 
And if we can't break this wall then we can't catch this fall.. 
Is there a way we can save tonight if you and I collide? 
Yes, we're crashing down. Oh, we're crashing down. 

That night, Sidharth held her in his arms and he had kissed her as she unbuttoned his shirt, followed by him running his hands across her waist - each getting of rid of what shielded them from each other as they headed towards the inevitable. 

Where were they heading, Shehnaaz had wondered. Was this the point of no return? 

As they lay in bed that night, Shehnaaz in his arms with her head against her chest - she had felt a hot tear escape her eyes. She had him just where she wanted him to be - what now? 

As Shehnaaz drifted to sleep she thought she heard Sidharth whisper a "I Love You" the same time as she did. Such was not her fate she wasn't that lucky, her subconscious mind stated.  

"I know," she had whispered back. This time too, she had illusion of him whispering the same.  

What now, Shehnaaz thought.  
What now, Sidharth thought.