The One For Him

The One For Him ~ 1

I walked down the aisle, and everyone around me beamed with a smile. I felt so giddy and light-headed.

I looked ahead and there he was, Lloyd Durant, the man of my dreams, my soulmate, my bestfriend but... never my lover.

Unfortunately, yes, he was never mine. He wasn't for me, because he didn't love me the way I loved him. That was what he said to me a week ago.

7 days before, my world fell apart. I was heartbroken. And now, here I was, pretending as if everything's fine.

I had to keep a plastered smile on my face because we were surrounded by our families and common friends. The people who all thought we would end up together. I never wanted to attend this wedding but my pride wouldn't let me. He was one of my best friends after all and my love for him was stronger than my pride.

I gently sat on the front pew together with the other bridal entourage. I knew Lloyd was looking at me because I felt his eyes on me but I kept my vision averted. I didn't want him to see my unshed tears. I kept blinking my eyes and faked a wide smile. I knew I looked almost comical smiling like that, wearing my body-hugging, old-rose coloured gown. The gown his soon to be wife chose for me.

That witch!

Suddenly everyone stood up for she, the bride has finally arrived.

Jenna Michaels. Yup, that's her. Jenna, the cheerleader, the muse, popular girl in high school, the one we never thought he'd like, the one he now loves, the one he now adores.

The ceremony became a blur to me. I heard them exchanging their vows but I couldn't hear a thing. My mind was in a limbo, in a blanketed dark aura. My heart was in a deeper, overwhelming pain.

"You may now kiss your bride", the priest declared, then the church was filled with a loud applause and my heart burned with sorrow.

━━━━⊱⋆⊰━━━━

"Claire!", someone woke me out of my reverie.

Yes, that's me Claire, a pet name used by those who loves me, derived from Clarissa Rebecca Thomas.

I looked up and saw Tara and her boyfriend Marc coming towards my way. Our best friends since highschool.

I smiled at them and said, "Hiya."

She looked at me with sadness in her eyes, it was almost a look of pity so I said...

"Oh, darling please don't be like that, I'm happy for him", I used a fake british accent trying to be funny but I knew what she meant by that look even without saying a word.

"You always do this Claire, it's unfair! I know how you feel, you can't hide it from me", she was almost wailing that Marc hugged her tight on his side.

Oh, how I envy them. Their love is so real.

"Hush babe, you will just make Claire cry the more, can't you see she is trying her best to be strong?"

"I know but he didn't have to be so selfish you know! Argh! Ooh, I hate Lloyd!", Tara declared vehemently.

"Babe calm down, this is his wedding.", Marc chuckled.

"Tara, I'm really fine. If I wasn't here then I'd be dead by now", I giggled, a fake one. I tried to crack a joke but they took it seriously though.

"Don't you dare do or say things like that, Clarissa Rebecca!", her nose almost flared with anger.

My bestfriend, no one could ever fool her.

"Sorry, it was a bad joke but what do you expect me to do, Tar? If I won't show up, Aunt Leoni and Mom would be so devastated, too. I can't let them know how all of these are making me feel."