The One For Him

The One For Him ~ 35

"Babe, why did you leave? Where are you now? Please talk to me. I'm worried about you", that's the eleventh message I got from my voicemail from him.

I listened to it but I refused to answer his calls. He must be panicking now. His secretary must have informed him I left his office crying. I turned my phone off.

Even the sound of his voice hurts me. That voice I loved to hear, the voice which whispered and declared his love for me all the time, made me doubt his words now.

I found myself sitting in a famous park, drowning in my own thoughts. The sun was setting down, it was almost six in the evening. Nevertheless, there were many people there, unwinding. Most of them were from a large private owned hospital nearby. At least being here, I am not alone.

I didn't want to go home yet because I knew he would find me there. I wanted to ran away, so far away. I wanted to visit my parents but I got to teach class tomorrow.

I felt so all alone. I wanted to cry but my tears refused to fall.

I felt petrified.

How can I trust him again after knowing the truth of what he has done? It can't be. No, it just can't be!

My tears fell unexpectedly.

God! Why of all people did I fall in love with him? Why?

Alex told me about his bad boy ways before but he never told me anything about them. I never thought he could be cruel. So calculating.

"Mommy, is she crying?", an adorable chubby, little boy asked his mother as they walked past me.

"Yes, I  think she is my love."

The mother who spoke looked very pretty. From the uniform she was wearing, she was either working as a doctor or a nurse in the nearby hospital.

"Can I give her my lollipop? I still got one extra left from Aunt Del", he inquired and his mother nodded.

The little boy came towards me and offered me his sweets. I smiled at him and wiped my tears away.

"Thank you", I whispered my gratitude.

"You want a hug? Granny said if mommy is crying I must give her a hug to make her feel better", he looked at me innocently with smart coral blue eyes. I glanced at his mother for approval who was smiling fondly at us and she nodded.

"He loves doing that", she said.

I smiled at her and hugged her son. His soft body smelled of sweet baby cologne. All of my frustrations were instantly gone after that. I felt different, as if hugging him cleared my mind.

I let him go after a while. He was beaming at me with such a huge smile. His dimples made him look so adorable. He must look like his father for he didn't resemble his mother.

"You okay now, miss?"

I nodded.

"Sweetie, introduce yourself to your new friend", his mom walked towards us and squatted beside him. He nodded.

"My name's Aaron Dominic. This is my mommy. What's your name?"

"I'm Clarissa. Nice to meet you Aaron."

He grinned at his mommy, proud of himself for having a new friend. His mother kissed him.

"A.D. we need to go now, say your goodbyes."

"Bye, Miss Clarissa. We're going to see grandma tonight. I hope we'll see each other again."

"I know we will."

His mother stood up and so I did the same. To my surprise, she took my hand and grasped it tightly.

"Whatever it is you're going through this time, just be strong, Clarissa. You're not alone. I know how it feels like for I'm going through the same heart aches as you", she whispered and then smiled sadly at me. I nodded. She must have sensed my heart was breaking. Then they left, with her little boy waving and smiling at me. I waved back and smiled.

I took a deep breath. Running away from my problems wouldn't solve anything. I got to face and confront him. I couldn't trust him wholeheartedly if there were too many negativities in our lives.

I have to fight for him, whatever it takes. I know I can't let us down. I need to give us a chance. I'll keep us together. I know there were risks when I said yes. When I agreed to marry him.

Now is the time to know the truth.

To know everything. Every tiny little details.

Or if not, he will lose me.

Just like that.

Just like a snap of his fingers.