Are You Mine?

i.

Sitting in peak hour traffic, the rain pissing down on the windscreen, I realised that I was completely and utterly in love with my best friend. When had it begun? As I drummed my fingers on the steering wheel, I tried to pinpoint exactly when I had fallen head over heels for Felicia.

It didn't make sense.

People had always told me that I'd know the very moment I would fall in love. That I'd instinctually know who my soul mate was the instant I met them.

But that hadn't happened.

When I first met Felicia, we had got along in that awkward manner when it came to first dates. Over coffee, we had decided that it was better if we kept it friendly. There had been no immediate spark. No romantic chemistry. A sudden bolt of lightning hadn't come through the roof of the coffee shop and struck me down just to tell me that she was the one. Nor had there been any declarations of love or strange gooey heart action.

No. Love wasn't like that. Not for me, at least.

At most, I might have felt nauseated on that first date. For too long, my parents and peers had pressured me into dating. After holding out for so long, I'd finally caved in.

Felicia had seemed amicable enough through text. The fact that we shared quite a few hobbies was a plus.

In the end, love was something that had slowly crept up behind me, bludgeoned me hard on the head and robbed me of all that I was worth.

Oh God. Was boardgame night going to be weird?

Yet, the more I thought about it as I waited for the traffic to move, the more I came to realise that nothing needed to change. What I felt for Felicia was a deep abiding fondness. Our relationship wasn't one that was built on false pretences. Felicia and I knew each other intimately in the way of all best friends did.

In my mind, she represented comfort; like coming back home after a long hard day at work.

That thought carried me through the worst of the jam. Even when a truck driver swerved into my lane and would have taken me out if I hadn't seen it coming. On any other day, I would have thrown out a mouthful of expletives for their poor driving skills.

By the time I parked outside the house, it was nearly eight. My stomach was rumbling and I desperately needed to use the bathroom. Thankfully the rain had stopped.

Before I could exit the car and stretch my legs, the door to the house opened. Out stepped the woman that had been on my mind for the last hour or so. Her long black hair was kept in check by a floral headband and peeking out from the curtain of black were two pointy ears. Felicia always loved pretending she was an elf or woodland Fae.

There was a look of relief on her face when she caught sight of my car and she slipped her phone back into her pocket. Felicia hurried over as I clambered out. "There you are Leah. Shit, I thought that something had happened. I was just about to call you."

"Traffic was hell," I said, opening up the boot of my car and retrieving the three games I brought every time, hoping we'd get a chance to play them (spoiler alert: we never do). "Remind me why we always do this on Wednesday night?"

Felicia rolled her eyes. "Well, not everyone is as free as you are," she retorted. "I have dance on Thursdays, Damien has to wrangle his brood of children on the weekends, Anna has several commitments, and Viktor..."

I sighed. "Yes, yes. Viktor is busy trying to find his one true love at every single possible moment after Julie dumped him. It's a mystery how he pencils in all those dates AND somehow manages to come to game night. If you ask me, the way he goes about it makes it all feel so transactional. He's not going to land the big fish he wants by schmoozing through all the ladies in the country."