Hailey's POV
It was 12:45 a.m. and just couldn't get myself to sleep. All I could think about was what happened earlier with Daisy. What could all of this mean? Do I like girls? But I've always had an attraction towards boys so it's all just so confusing. I've known that bisexuality is something people identify with, but I just... I don't know. Like, it's something I've never considered nor something that feels right.
I spent about 2 hours just on my computer searching up random shit like, "Am I gay?" quizzes. Like how you see in the movies. In searching for things about the LGBTQIA+ community, I found that there are many other sexualities and gender identities. You learn something new every day. Though, it makes it a lot harder to know what I am. Or what I identify as. Oh god, what is even happening to me?
The Next Day
I walk into school while people stare at me. I suppose it's because I didn't sleep at all last night and I look terrible. I mean I usually do, but I look even worse. I make my way to the music room before a little earlier than usual as I assume no one is in there. I prove myself wrong as I see Luke in there. He quickly noticed that I was in the room.
"Oh, hey Hailey! I was just cleaning up Justin." Ah, yes. Not a day goes by that Luke doesn't clean his drum set whom he named Justin. For as long as I've known him, he always tended to be "overprotective" if you will, with his drums. He essentially acts like it's a person. Sometimes I think he loves his drums more than Zander. "Of course, you are," I say. He gets up from the floor and places his drumsticks on the desk.
"So, what were you doing yesterday that kept you busy?"
"What?" He chuckles."Zander mentioned that you had to stay after school for something. I was just wondering what that was." I tell him that it was simply to help out Daisy prepare for the Winter Festival. He tells me, "That's very nice of you". To which I agree with.
I feel the urge to tell him about how I've been feeling all day. But, the rest of the club shows up. Not that I would mind, but I rather just tell Luke. I feel like he's the only one that would understand. I mean there's also Zander but I've always trusted Luke and he trusted me. I was the first person he came out to. I still remember the day he told me. He seemed so scared and he was crying. He came out to me as bisexual. We just cried and just made sure he knew that it didn't change anything in our friendship.
Over the years, he's identified more with being pansexual. And he's not the only one that has figured out what they're more comfortable identifying as. In the videos I watched, some said that they originally came out with a different sexual orientation or gender identity, but after a bit of time, they started to identify with something different. Which made sense to me. "Has anyone seen, Jake?" I said. Zander clears his throat, "probably late, as usual".
"Damn, give him a break already!"
"Easy for you to say, Milly. You didn't have to deal with his bullshit these past years. And don't forget what happened before the band-"
Luke says, "All right, let's calm down before things get heated."Jake entered the club room, out of breath. I go over to him. "Why are you late, Jake?" He catches his breath. "Sorry, I stayed up all night playing video games with my brother-".
"Woah, did you just get to school?" Milly asks.
Sean responds, "Just about to ask that.""No!" Jake explains. "I was tired from last night that I fell asleep during English and... yeah now, I'm here." Typical Jake... We all started laughing and went on the rest of practice teasing Jake. We don't really practice as the competition is over, but we all like to hang out in the club than in the cafeteria. The bell rings for class. "Ugh, I don't wanna go to math class..." Milly sighs. Sean glares at Milly, sort of like a parental figure. "Don't even think about skipping, I already told Jake to watch out for you." Jake and Sean follow Milly to class to ensure she goes. As they left the room, it was just Luke, Zander, and I.
Luke's POV
Hailey seems like she has something on her mind. "I'm just glad things are better now with Jake and all of us," Zander tells me. "Same, but you know there is still a bit of tension between Hailey and Jake." Hailey is busy packing her stuff and has her earbuds in. Zander and I continue talking. "Yeah, I know. I mean it's understandable." The whole situation with Jake before the competition was just... so... surreal. It hurt us all but out of everyone, it hit Hailey, the hardest.
It's been about 2 months since it all happened. We've moved from the situation. Jake had been trying to mend his relationship with Drew, but there was no luck. I personally don't understand well enough, but Jake has his reasons for trying. Hailey has been doing better, but I know sometimes she still thinks about it. Jake and her have fixed their friendship but... you know. It's still awkward sometimes.
"Hey, you mind if I walk Hailey to class?"
"...Just for today. But you owe me many hugs afterward." I let out a chuckle.Hailey's POV
I listen to music while I pack my stuff for class. And also so I don't overhear Luke and Zander's conversation. Like, I love that they finally acknowledged their feelings for each other... but you NEVER want to hear or see them being flirty with each other. It's cute, but also cringey at times. At least for me. Some might find it endearing. It's also something about seeing my step-brother and my best friend be... like that. That probably doesn't make sense.
I see Zander leave the club room without Luke for once. Odd. Luke is still in the room. He walks towards me. "Wow, never seen y'all not walk to class since ever!" He chuckles. "Well, it's really because I wanted to check up on you." I looked up at him. Maybe you could tell him now? "Why?" I ask.
"It's just, you know... with everything that's happened this past year and how that's affected you..."
"Yeah, it's been quite a school year. And it's barely just the first half."
We laugh."Why do you mention it?" He tells me "You've just seemed distracted today. I was just wondering if it had anything to do with Jake or anything really." There is silence. Should I tell him? He'll understand, right? I mean it's Luke! But I don't know it's still... scary. I start to cry without realizing it. "Woah, Hailey! Is everything okay? I'm so sorry I shouldn't have brought the thing with Jake and-" I stop him and laugh while still crying. "No, it's not that Luke. It's actually far from that." He wipes my tears with the tissues from the desk.
"Then what is it, Hailey?" I pause for a bit. I take a deep breath. "Umm... you know how I helped Daisy yesterday?" He nods. "Well, there was a moment where we got really close, and umm.. I..." I pause. Tears start forming in my eyes again. I just look up at Luke. He is looking at me with tears as well and a face that seems like he understands what I'm about to say. "I think, I like her..." my voice breaks, "...and I'm just- so... confused." There is silence. We just stare at each other. He then hugs me and just cries with me. The bell rings, but we ignore it.
This is something really important.
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A Lovely Winter With You | A TMF Fanfic
RomanceWhile helping out Daisy prep for the Winter Festival at school, a little incident lead Hailey to question her sexuality. During the month of December, Hailey goes through the journey of discovering herself while also sharing moments with Daisy. All...