From Nothing (BoyxBoy)

03. Give Him A Chance

Harry's P.O.V.

Almost an hour later I was still huddled up in that alleyway crying. It hurt, everything hurt. It hurt like hell. I just sat there on the cold concrete floor, leaning against the dumpster and wallowing in self pity. There were no other words to describe myself. I was truly pitiful. 'Fuck, I hate myself so much!'

I really just had no clue as to what I was going to do. I was lost, both figuratively and metaphorically. Lost because I didn't know where I was in the real world. But also lost inside. Some people say that inside everyone's heart there is a light to guide them, to help them along their path in life. Well, it felt like someone had reached inside my heart and switched mine off, leaving me to shoot in the dark.

Emotional turmoil. Most definitely, those are two words to describe what I was feeling inside. Especially on the subject of... Louis. It actually hurt to even think that. My feelings toward him were so confusing, I didn't know what to make of them. I sighed loudly, looking up at the stars. There were a lot of them that night. 'Look at the stars, look how they shine for you...' just popped into my head unexpectedly. 'Perfect line for a poem,' I thought 'But about what?'

Looking at the stars, I felt a strange calm. Like nothing could hurt me anymore. But that was gone after a moment. And the pain returned. I buried my face into my knees and silently screamed.

.

"Harry?" a male voice sounded in front of me, very softly. So soft, in fact, that I could barely hear it. It sounded strangely like Louis' voice. I almost choked at the absurdity of the thought. The only time that... that person ever talks to me is to insult me. I looked up and our eyes locked. The figure was less than a metre away from me, the moonlight shining on his face giving him an ethereal glow. But it was his blue-grey eyes that gave him away - I knew those eyes. It was Louis! I could not believe it. "Oh, Harry..." he murmured, looking at me with sympathy.

That made me mad; madder than I ever had been before. I'm not an angry person, I find it impossible to be angry for too long. To me, raising my voice is a chore. But he really pissed me off.

"What, Louis?!" I hissed, unable to keep the venom out of his tone. I saw his expression go from concerned, to confused, to hurt, to angry, back to hurt and finally back to concerned. Then to realisation.

"I'm sorr--" he began, but I cut him off.

"Oh spare me your apologies!" I spat, the emotions that I had kept bottled up inside me for so long were bubbling up and threatening to spill over. "I don't want to hear them! I don't want your stupid pity!"

"Harry just listen to--" I cut him off again.

"Listen to what, exactly?" I said wearily, casting my eyes downward "To how much of a freak I am? To how disgusting I am? To how much I deserve to die? To how much I'm worthless? The list goes o-o-o-o-on!" I stretched the 'o' from 'on' into a very long sound "Because I know all that, ok. I know. So you can stop telling me!" By the end, my voice had dropped to barely more than a whisper.

His eyes widened. "No I..." he began, but his voice broke and he stopped. Then, before I knew it, his arms were around me and he was hugging me.

I couldn't believe he was hugging me. What happened to the bitter hatred he held for me? Normally I'd be spread out on the ground getting my body beaten black and blue for that comment. But I wasn't. Instead, he was hugging me! It was wrong, I knew that. It was wrong for two mortal enemies to be hugging each other in the middle of the night on a cold, concrete floor. It just felt wrong, but at the same time so utterly, breathtakingly right.