"Fall in love with someone, who is both your safe place and your biggest adventure" -Bianca Sparacino
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❤️🩹chapter 8:you have me❤️🩹
Surprisingly enough my dad really liked my friends after he got to know them. He had a long and meaningful conversation with Yuuji about what it takes to be a soldier. And he got some fashion advice from Nobara.
He didn't spoke to Sukuna. In fact, Sukuna didn't speak to anyone..especially me. He just sat there to the side on the smallest chair and had that frown on his face. Arms locked in front his chest, eyes closed, the frown..I get it, he's mad at me. Very mad.
It was getting really late. The Sun was about to rise and none of us had any sleep this night, so my father offered the guest room to Nobara and Yuuji, and the couch to Sukuna. Sukuna made it perfectly clear that he doesn't want to stay, but Yuuji was too tired to drive, so they had no choice.
Both me and Langa prepared the guest room first and I strictly warned Yuuji and Nobara no sex in the house, while my dad is here. After that I went to take some blankets and a pillow for Sukuna.
Everyone went to sleep, while I was fixing the bed he was supposed to sleep in. Sukuna was just sitting on the same chair and refused to even look at me. I could feel him glaring at me from time to time, but every time I tried to catch him...he looked away.
"Are you still going to avoid speaking to me, or we are going to talk it out?", I finally turn to him, because I've had enough.
"There's nothing to talk about, y/n", Sukuna stood up and walks up to the couch, then he sat on the already fixed bed and finally look at me straight in the eyes, "I just don't understand".
"You don't understand what?".
"Why did you say you love me, why do you wanna be with me, when you don't even want me to be by your side?".
His eyes looked so sad at that moment and there's a little movement around the jaw area, his muscles were dancing up and down. His body wasn't as tense as before, but it wasn't calm either. He was hurt.
I sat next to him and I took his hand in mine, Sukuna didn't pull away, didn't tell me to get off him or not touch him. He just stood there holding my arm expecting me to say the worst possible answer, but I wasn't going to.
"I know that these things are very important to you", I began saying, "I guess your ex was relaying on you for a lot of things, but...I'm not her. I need a little bit of time to get used to having someone by my side, I've never had this or you...I've always been alone. Please, just..be patient with me, okay?".
"I am trying to be, y/n", his red eyes look even more sad now, "but seems like every time I try to give you time, space and to be understanding with you...you push me away".
"I will try my best, okay? But please don't doubt my feelings for you. They are real, I know they are...".
Sukuna wraps his arm around me and pulls me closer until my left cheek is pressed in his hard chest. I listen to his fast heartbeat and I smile to myself. He was so excited, his heart was running miles for me.
I can't describe to you how happy I was to have him here, even if it's only for tonight. I was so incomplete without him, without my friends that I wasn't feeling..like myself. For fuck sake, he drove two hours only to see, if I'm okay. I can't believe..Sukuna did that.
"I really miss you, y/n", Sukuna told me in a low voice almost whispering, "it's been so long since I held you, it hurts to think about it".
"I'm here now".
"Yes, you are", he let go off me and then fully turns to face me, "when I was suspended for awhile I had some time to think. I had the opportunity to stay with myself and organise my life a little bit, my decisions".
"What are you saying?", I asked in confusion.
"I'm saying that I was wrong. I was wrong for everything I did to you, everything that i told you and...I'm sorry. I'm over my ex, I'm over everything, but you".
"Sukuna...".
"No, listen", he cuts me off, "you drive me crazy, y/n, everything about you makes me go nuts. And the thought of you being with someone else makes me feel like shit. Because we both know you don't belong with anyone else, but me. Me and you...we are the perfect disaster. Me and you...we are toxic, but without each other...we are nothing".
"Is that what you want? A perfect disaster?", I asked him.
"Yeah", he smiled, "if that disaster will make me the happiest person on Earth. Do you want a perfect disaster?".
"My life has been a disaster. Nothing will change for me", I smiled.
Sukuna came closer and closer, then he lift my chin up. I closed my eyes expecting him to kiss me, but a second passed without a kiss. I open my eyes to see Sukuna staring at my dad, who was watching us with a smile.
When Levi smiles it's really creeping a person out, because he's always so serious. I jump back on the couch leaving a safe space between me and Sukuna, but my dad continues to just stay there, smile and stare.
"If a perfect disaster means ruining your lives in the name of love, then I guess you two should go for it", my dad said and turns his back at us, "just remember that nothing is forever and your decision can be questioned later in life".
My dad walks away leaving both me and Sukuna speechless.
That night my dad indirectly told us that we are not meant for each other, that we'll be wrong for choosing the perfect disaster instead of happy life, but we didn't listen.
This night was just the beginning of the worst nightmare you can have. We just didn't know it yet.
UNEDITED
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